The Undetermined Outside

Chapter Twenty Three

*Levi's POV*

The expedition was three days ago. It failed, horrifically. Besides not being anywhere closer to having our hands on another titan shifter, we now found out that there's a female version of them. She murdered so many of our men. Some of which were my entire squad.

Olou, Gunther, Eld, and Petra. They all were victim to the female titan due to my command to protect Eren at all costs. If I hadn't refueled my ODM that titan probably would've gotten away with Eren, too. I have tried to keep my distance from everyone and blame it on my twisted ankle that I received saving Mikasa's revengeful ass, but I am still grieving their deaths.

My tea was replaced with whiskey when Erwin told me about Armin's plan to capture her. They had many reasons to believe that the person inside the titan was Annie, the only top ten ranking cadet in the 104th that didn't join the Scouts. Once he explained their combined plan to me I gave my thoughts. But regardless, I let them all go on their own because I was in no condition to be going against her so soon.

When they did return, they returned fruitless yet again, with no Annie Leonhart in tow. She had crystalized herself and is now being held somewhere in a basement by the Military Police. No one is sure when or if she'll ever come out of her frozen capsule.

Despite the many failures we have endured recently, life is still moving on. I am supposed to select a new squad, but I have yet to make any final decisions on the matter, considering how new most of them are.

Erwin had us all gather in the mess hall to discuss our dinner plans, of which he had kept secret until now.

"Tonight, you are all off lunch duty. We are treating all of you to a meal at a local pub. Obviously drinks are on the house," a ruckus could be heard from Eren's table, ",,, to those of drinking age." Their 'awes' in response were obnoxiously loud to say the least.

I decided to add my two cents on the matter, seeing as this is under the Scout's allowance for the month. "This is a family business so there will be no drunkards tonight. If I have to see any one of you break anything or, god forbid, puke, I will give you cleaning duties for a week. Understood?"

"Sir, yes, sir!" They shouted in response. Immediately followed by a chorus of excited chatter at the prospect of going into town and seeing other people besides their comrades for once. I could hear Connie talk about meeting some of the local girls and Jean telling him that he doesn't stand a chance when he's around. They're all idiots, I swear.

I excused myself to go back to my office. I only had an hour before we departed and I wanted to make sure I looked decent. With my semi-compromised leg I have been feeling pretty worthless to the others, but the least I can do is appear totally put together. One swig of whiskey for the road.

No matter how many times I see their faces in my mind, it always brings me to their final moments. I found them in so many horrendous poses in the aftermath of Leonhart. There was so much blood covering the greenery of that forest. I couldn't save them, just like I couldn't save everyone else. This is the perfect example of why I don't let anyone inside my inner circle anymore.

Death is ever present around me. Everywhere around me are people dying; by circumstance or by my own hand. If I could eradicate all these damn titans, maybe there'd be less death to deal with. Maybe I could open myself up, but I don't know.

I put on a nice pair of dark blue khakis with my long sleeve grey shirt tucked into it. And then grabbed a jacket to throw over myself in case there was a chill later in the evening, or some idiot spilled their drink on me. As I finished with my appearance I was brought to the thought that y/n should be there. Her impending doom was closing in on us as I realized she'd have to deal with Erwin and all the other horny teenagers again.