Loki, my darling

I

I was born almost 1000 years ago, or that's what I think, nobody has ever exactly told me. My mother was Hela, the goddess of death, and I was born after she had a "visitor" during her banishment. She named me Cassandra, which she said was my dad's last wish. That's the only thing she ever told me about him. She wasn't overall really talkative or kind, she put a lot of pressure on me. I was barely able to walk or talk when she was already pressuring me to learn to fight, to use my power for things I didn't want to use them for. But she was all I had so I still tried to love her in my own ways, usually getting punishment in return. "Love is a weakness," she always said. She raised me for my first four years (in human years - ihy) of life, then Heimdall told Odin about me and he got me out. My mum had taught me Odin was bad and since Odin didn't explain himself when taking me away from my mum that's what it seemed like to me. All my later contacts with him only seemed to prove it.

I then found myself imprisoned in a cell in Asgard, merely a little child. I didn't understand why I was there, nothing was explained to me, nor did I know what the world outside was like. Part of me thought this was normal, but I found myself unable to believe it. I had "hologram" visitors like teachers etc, and sometimes two little boys came behind the glass side of the cell to look at me as if I was in a zoo. I was the "funny animal", put there for others' pleasure. They talked about what I might've done to be kept as a prisoner like that, but even I didn't know, so how could they. I usually turned my back to them, tried to ignore them, but when one time they started to ramble about me probably brutally killing my parents I snapped. I would never purposefully hurt anyone unless they really deserved it. I stood up and looked at them, the blue-eyed blonde seemed a bit shaken by that, but the black-haired boy with green eyes seemed mesmerized by me. After staring into his beautiful eyes for about a minute I sat back down and turned my back to them. After a while, I was sure they had left, as it was all silent as usual, so I got up to try and find something to do. I made myself a doll out of ice. I had elemental control powers, which my mum had taught me to use pretty well, except I didn't want to use them the way she had wanted me to. I had had ice, water, fire, air, and earth manipulation powers since birth, but nobody here knew of them, I was keeping them hidden. My mum tried to teach me to use them, but she always made me cause weapons or destruction and I didn't enjoy that. I picked it up only to notice the black-haired boy still there, staring at me with his mouth dropped open. He stepped closer, unafraid, and placed his hand onto the cell's see-through wall. He wasn't afraid of me like everyone else was. I still quickly burned the toy and it disappeared, I tried to act as if it was never there, I was afraid they'd hurt me if they found out. I laid onto my bed with my back turned to him and cried as silently and unnoticeably as I could. I don't know how long he was there, he seemed different and not just because he wasn't afraid. It was something in his eyes, something that wanted to take the fear out of me, but I just couldn't let that happen. Right now fear was one of the things keeping me alive and safe.