After 2 more long, long weeks, Percy was discharged. From the hellhole that he told himself months ago he'd never go back to.
He had the same strict meal plan and schedule. The threat of going back to the hospital but with a tube up up his note floated around.
He wasn't sure if he was going to even try recovering after getting out, he was tired of trying. Being forced to dissociate from everyone and being locked in a room for 6 weeks fucked up the dirty blondes mind.
Percy was just happy to be home. To be away from beeping machines, needles, nurses running in and out of his room to wake him up at the crack of dawn.
Just hours after coming home, Percy asked Sorin to come over and was tackled with the biggest hug ever. He really, really needed a hug.
Oh god, he missed him. Getting a hug from Sorin was more of a craving than cigarettes, which was really saying something.
Percy wanted to be held forever, he felt so safe and warm and protected. Just the single, long hug distracted him from everything else going on.
"What can I do to help you with everything?"
Percy simply shrugged, his eyes on Sorin's hand, which he was playing with. His finger ran over the old boys knuckles before flipping his hand around, tracing the lines on his palm.
"Percy..."
"Its not a big deal, just something that got out of hand."
Sorin carefully lifted Percy's chin up, their eyes meeting. Those gorgeous, bright blue eyes pierced Percy, his gaze stone and grave.
The blondes eyes said everything, his silence was so, so fucking loud.
"I don't know, Sorin." Percy whispered, switching his eyes to the side, looking anywhere but Sorin's harsh stare. "I don't even know how to help myself at this point, to be honest."
With a frown, Sorin pressed his lips to Percy's head, letting out a small sigh. His warm breath hit the dirty blondes forehead.
"You make me happy, so damn happy...but it's just when I'm alone... when I'm eating...and I start thinking more of how to make excuses not to eat or how horrible the food is than to think of you..."
Sorin nodded, his lips pursed into a thin line. Percy continued to fiddle with his boyfriends hand.
"I don't know what to do anymore, Sorin..." The dirty blonde inhaled a deep breathe until his lungs burned. "I just..."
He lost his words, his mind went blank. He didn't even know what to say anymore, what to do.
"Do you want me to text you more?"
"I don't know... I don't want you to have to worry about me..."
Sorin frowns again, pressing a kiss to the boys head again. "I'll always worry about you, Percy. I want you to be okay and happy, if texting and checking on you more help..."
"I don't want you to feel like you have to-"
"Percy, you're my boyfriend and I care so, so very much about you."
The dirty blonde just nodded, not sure how to reply. He just felt so empty, like nothing. He felt like he was just a blinking doll, he felt like he wasn't even fucking human.
He felt so fucking lost and confused. He was either overthinking or not thinking at all. He didn't know what to fucking do anymore.
He didn't even know if he wanted to do...life anymore more than half the time.
