The Diary of Our Love

Chapter 41

I woke up the next morning to find chaos in my living room and James crashed on the floor. Judging by the beer cans he had around him, I dare to say he just passed out. I started cleaning the mess he left by putting all the empty bottles and cans in the garbage. James must have fallen asleep so drunk that I was walking over him and making a lot of noise and he didn't move. After cleaning, I sat on the couch and watched James sleeping on the floor for a while. I thought about what he had told me the night before and I felt so angry at him, but at the same time seeing him there on the floor made my heart ache a bit and I wanted to help him. He needed help. Couldn't anyone see that? Did anyone care? I cared... I cared for all people together...

I did know his drinking was getting out of hand, but I didn't know how out of hand it was until I saw all that mess in my house. Until that very moment. The quantity of alcohol he had drank was enough to put an elephant to sleep, no wonder he was passed out. However, I couldn't leave him there on the floor, so I tried to wake him up. Nothing worked. I shook him. I tried to lift him up. I didn't get any reaction. I freaked out a little and I started to look around to see if I found anything besides alcohol. I knew he wasn't into drugs. He told me he has tried some but that was as far as he went. Anyway, he was so dead the thought crossed my mind, and for a moment I thought he might he had mixed all that alcohol with something else. Not finding anything, I went to the kitchen filled a glass with water and dumped it on his face, he opened his eyes instantly.

"Wake up, Hetfield." I said still beyond mad at him. "I guess you better have a shower. It seems to me you had a rough night." I said, walking back to the kitchen to leave the empty glass in the sink.

"What the fuck..." He mumbled.

Then, he rubbed his face a couple of times without saying a word and he got up. I could tell he was having the hangover of his lifetime, so I made him some coffee. Not that I was sorry for him, I was ready to kick his ass, but because I wanted him to listen to what I had to tell him carefully. While the coffee was brewing, I went to my bedroom to change. I took off my nightgown and went straight to the shower. I took a long shower and felt relaxed. I got dressed and came back to the living room and he was already having a cup of the strong coffee I had made. I looked at him but I didn't say anything. He looked a mess. James looked like he would still pass out at any moment. I went to the kitchen and poured a cup of coffee for me. I felt his head following me around though, and seeing I wasn't eating anything James decided to talk.

"You need to eat." He said tentatively.

"And you need to stop drinking." I shot at him. "What kind of party was this one I found here in the morning? Do you think I want this kind of stuff in my house?"

"I'm sorry" He told me.

"You've drank enough to put an elephant to sleep. How can you take such level of alcohol in your blood?" I said, speaking a mile an hour and walking towards him. "I don't want that kind of stuff in my house. If you want to destroy yourself, fine! But do it away from me."

"I said, I was sorry." He yelled and then cringed. His head must have been giving him such hell.

"Being sorry isn't enough. You have to do something. You need help, James." I yelled at him.

At some point I didn't know if I was yelling at him because I was mad or because I was so scared about what he was doing to himself. Or maybe both. But I was so afraid of the rough path he was taking.

"You're exaggerating." He yelled back. "It's not like that!" He claimed. "I was pissed off so I might have gotten a bit carried away but that's it. I don't drink like this every day." He said, fighting me back.