The Diary of Our Love

Chapter 9

Startled with all that had just happened, I leaned with my back against the wall still trying to figure it all out and still shaking. Probably, I was still trying to subside the rush of my orgasm too. It had all been sudden and fast and awkward and still incredibly good. God... I was so confused and ecstatic at the same time, trying to process it all. I stayed there for a while just motionless, waiting for my breathing to stabilize and my brain to quiet down. Still, my heart was blooming and there was nothing I could do to stop or avoid that. When I felt calmer, I went to the bathroom and I washed my hands and then I decided to replace my jeans for a short black skirt. Not short in a slutty way, short in a sexy way. I wanted to cause an impression on him if I was going to meet him backstage and a skirt could be sexier than some random jeans. Just when I was done, Lil arrived which was a plus because I needed someone to talk to and Lil was my person.

"Hey girl! How have you been?" She greeted me with her warming smile while entering the suite.

"I've been alright" I answered forcing a smile.

The events by the wall behind her were just too fresh and I felt a little numb. It was just a plain white wall. A wall just like any other wall... but to me it had a whole different meaning.

"Are you sure?" Lil frowned. "You seem..." She paused. "I don't know... weird..." She added studying my face.

"Yes, I woke up with this terrible headache." I told her.

"You're shaking!" She stated.

It was true... When she pointed it out, I realized I was not calm at all. I was still shaking, and it had been a while.

"I just need a drink." I said reaching for a tiny bottle of vodka from the fridge.

I opened it and I swallowed the liquid fast. I was not a drinker, let alone of Vodka and Lil found my reaction extremely strange. She knew me better than anyone else. She knew all my highs and lows. She knew me at my best and at my worst. She simply knew me and I could not fool her.

"Wow..." She blurted with her eyes completely goggled. "Something definitely happened. You don't even drink vodka not to mention it's 11.30 am." She paused looking at me. "Aren't you gonna tell me?" Lil insisted.

"See... I feel much better now" I said instead of answering her.

Then, I sat on the couch and waved at her to join me. I would tell her. She was my best friend and I had to share it with someone. I trusted her. I would trust her my own life and I knew she would keep it a secret.

"James was here right before you arrived." I started.

"...now we're talking." She smiled instantly. She was the only one that knew what was really happening for she was the only one I trusted secrecy. "What has he done to you?" She asked.

Everything... he made me come in less than five minutes using just a hand, but that was not even the point. It was the first that came up to my mind but it was not what was really disturbing me and causing me doubts.

"He wants me to join him on tour." I let her know. "I mean... as friends... but still..."

"That's pretty serious!" She sounded surprise. "I was expecting everything but that..." Lil shook her head. "That is... huge..."

"I know." I nodded. "I am so confused." I let out. Lil studied me for a bit and then spoke.

"You want to go." She stated. "I look in your eyes and I see that you want to go." She was my best friend, so she knew it all.

"I'm scared shitless." I confessed. "I mean... look at who he is!"

"I would be too, Lea..." She told me. "...but this might be the chance of a lifetime. Follow your heart, your instincts, it has never failed you." Lil added. "If it doesn't work, if it's not for you..."