youngblood | a.i.

forty one || track one

Friday, October 30th- 9:09 p.m.

As the next week passed us by, I felt so much more of my Ashton show through. It was like he finally had shifted to realize he didn't like who he was when he was trying to impress them, so he started being himself. He stopped caring about what they thought of us anymore.

There was a moment at practice when he chased me down after I beat him at a drill. It was a playful thing but it was something normal Ashton would have never done.

Normal Ashton would have put up his facade around the team, refusing to show any affection towards me.

Normal Ashton still slept with a new girl each weekend.

Normal Ashton drank to stop the thoughts.

Normal Ashton never let anyone else in his room.

Normal Ashton hid his emotions to keep everyone around him from seeing him as weak.

My Ashton didn't need to drink. The thoughts weren't worth stopping anymore.

My Ashton hadn't slept with a new girl since he'd met me, because his every waking moment was spent with me.

My Ashton let me, and only me, into his room, and not just to sleep with me. He let me into his room to help me take off my makeup and untie my dress. He let me into his room to dance around the room to Satellite by Nickelback on record, explaining to me why he was my satellite.

My Ashton didn't shield his emotions, because he was finally starting to feel that happiness I'd glued him back together with.

There was another moment where he walked through school with my hand in his, something he never used to do. He talked to me about our Halloween costume for his party this weekend, and how he wanted to go as matching mob bosses. What did that mean? Couldn't tell you, but the smile on his face made it worth it.

I think after that night at homecoming- when we danced in his room together- we both realized this was more than what we thought.

He admitted that night that I was his whole world, what was keeping him grounded, and I sang it back to him, knowing exactly what it meant. We'd finally admitted to each other that we cared beyond drunken phone calls and weekends at the lake house.

We both genuinely cared for the other, we just didn't know how to explain it in words beyond that yet.

So when his name lit up my phone screen at 9 pm on a Friday night I'd told him I needed to spend studying, I didn't know what to expect from him. I brought the phone to my ear, opening my mouth to speak when he beat me to it.

"Angel!" he immediately said, catching my attention.

"What?" I said back, making sure to use the same confusing tone he had called my name in.

"Get ready!" he said back, sounding more excited than I did.

"For what?" I asked back, trying to figure out what I forgot about. "The Halloween party is tomorrow."

I stood up scrambling, starting to fear I missed something.

"I know," he said back, sounding more relaxed than me now. "But get ready."

"But for what, Ash! What did I miss?" I asked back, completely confused at this point.

"Nothing," he admitted, sounding completely relaxed now. "But get your shit together," he laughed.

"Ashton, what are you talking about?" I finally asked, completely lost in this moment.

"It's a surprise," he finally told me, the sound of his car becoming apparent in the background. "But I'll be there in five minutes, so be ready."