youngblood | a.i.

forty two || track two to five

Friday, October 30th- 9:17 p.m.

As the song approached the end, I looked back over to him. I could see how his eyes darted between the road and me, trying to read my expression.

"How did you know I loved that song?" I asked, my happiness audible in my voice.

"A wild guess?" he shrugged. "I saw some of your records on your wall that night I slept in your room. I knew almost one song off of each, and I was thinking about it when I was making this."

"So you just picked random ones from each of those records?" I asked, trying to understand how he'd gone about it.

"No," he started as the next track started playing.

Track Two wish i loved you in the 90s
Tate McRae

I sucked in a deep breath at the familiar note, remembering the night it had played.

You said you'd never lie
But you did it anyway
So how am I supposed to feel
When you said, "It's so real, " to my face?

And you said you'd make a promise
But a promise never stays
So how am I supposed to act
When it's just how it is nowadays?

"Every song on here I picked for a specific reason, hence your paper," he explained as we both listened to the same lyrics as we had a month earlier. "There's gonna be some you don't know at all, but most I knew you would."

And I swear, we kinda fell in love with the pain
And I'm scared, we don't even know the right way

I nodded, leaning back into my seat as I digested this all.

Had you told the Anastasia that sat on that roof the night this song played that she was falling head over heels for Ashton Irwin, the guy she had been conditioned to hate, she would have laughed in your face.

Had you told that Anastasia that Ashton Irwin was the glue holding her together right now, she would have called you a liar.

I wish I loved you in the '90s
'Cause I know that we would work
Say wrong place, wrong time, should've been alive
Bet it wouldn't hurt

See, that Anastasia was conditioned to hate everything about him because that's the way he wanted it. This Anastasia was conditioned to fall for him, because, for once, someone, and in this case- him, was there to catch her.

The day this song played on my roof, Ashton had finally explained that whole night to me, and for the first time, I started to feel a magnetic pull to him. It was that night my magnet switched from negative to positive. We were no longer pushing each other away, we were pulling each other in.

If I had loved you in the '90s
Back when life wasn't a blur
Say right guy, right vibe, wouldn't have to try
Bet it wouldn't hurt

I hadn't admitted it to myself yet, but I had been wishing we had fallen in love in the 90s that night because I couldn't admit to myself that I was craving him more than I could admit. I thought, maybe had it been the '90s, I wouldn't get hurt for once.

You were going to hurt me no matter what, huh?

I fell in love with the pain.

But the '90s wouldn't have changed the fact that I craved him with every fiber of my being.

I lolled my head over to him as I awaited the start of the next song, listening carefully for the opening beats.