Natasha Romanoff x Reader one-shots [COMPLETE]

NOT ENOUGH [A] [TW]

I stared in front of the mirror and looked at myself, noticing ever single flaw I had on my body.

I'm too fat, I have so much acne, my arms are too big, my fingers are fat... I'm just not enough.

"Hey," Natasha opened the door to my room, "Come downstairs."

"Uhm, okay..." I responded.

I followed Natasha downstairs and then remembered we were having dinner. My least favorite time of all. I always felt disgusting when eating. Overeating was a big part of why I felt that way.

"Dinnertime!" Tony smiled and clapped like a child.

I chuckled softly.

"Thanks, but I actually already ate," I lied.

"You've been eating out a lot lately..." Steve narrowed his eyes, "Do you not like my cooking?"

"No, no Steve! I love your cooking!" I defended.

Just then my stomach grumbled and I wanted to punch the living shit out of it.

"Y/N, you're clearly hungry," Natasha pulled me to the table, "Sit."

"Fine, " I sat down and everyone started eating.

I looked at my plate that was still filled with food. I wanted to eat, but at the same time I didn't.

If I overate, I'd gain more weight, and no one would love me, and I would probably die alone. Maybe not that far, but more or less.

"Are you going to eat that?" Tony looked at me, an eyebrow raised.

"Oh, you can have it if you want."

"Not what I meant, Y/N..."

"Oh," I looked down at my lap in embarrassment as my face flushed red.

Nat turned her head towards me, eyebrows knitted in curiosity and worry, "Why aren't you eating?"

"No reason," I cleared my throat, "I'll just eat in my room."

I stood up and grabbed the plate.

"Thank you Steve for making this," I thanked, not wanting him to think it was bad.

I walked out before he had a chance to respond and locked myself inside my room.

I threw the plate out and felt bad because Steve worked hard on the dinner.

I sighed and laid down on my bed, pulling the covers over me.

This is how I'll live until I get skinny, I guess.

-
2 MONTHS LATER

It had been 2 months since I had completely stopped eating full meals. I knew that if people found out, they would call it an 'eating disorder', but I just call it a diet.

I had been losing weight a lot quicker, but for some inexplicable reason, I still felt fat.

I went down from 170 to a 120, but I there was an obsessing and overwhelming need to lose more.

I walked to the living room, a black hoodie over my body, slightly dizzy.

There had been dark spots clouding my vision, but I tried my best to ignore them.

As I walked to where everyone was, I kept tipping over.

"Are you okay?" Tony asked.

"Y-yeah... I'm fine," I stuttered.

"Good, because we're all having dinner in a few minutes."

"That's okay, I'm not that hungry," I gave them a weak smile.

"No, you're going to eat," Natasha demanded.

She was scary ...hot, magnificent, beautiful, but scary.

"No-" I furrow my eyebrows as I begin to protest.

"Dinner's ready!" Steve called out from the kitchen.

Everyone raced to the dining room and sat down. Natasha pulled me to the seat next to her, but as I sat down, her face had been enveloped with shock.

I quickly shrugged it off and looked at my plate of food. Everyone seemed to notice because none of them started eating, they all just stared at me.

"What?" I asked.

"We want you to eat first," Rhodey said.

"Why?" I nervously look among them.

"Don't ask," Natasha shrugged.

"That's not fair," I nervously said, a frown dawning on my face.

"At this point, we don't care if it's fair or not," Natasha sighed, "Eat."

I hadn't eaten a full meal in 2 months, and I didn't want to start now.

I lifted the fork up, my hand shaking terribly. It was just one bite, right? One bite and it's be over. One bite. Nothing will happen.

I hope they don't see how fucking scared I am.

"Okay, here it goes..." I fake smile.

I take the spaghetti in the fork and stare at it. My hand was still shaking, and just staring at the food made me sick. My ears started ringing and I started to shake more.

I placed my fork down and took a deep breath. I shake my head, "I'm sorry, I can't."

"I knew it," Natasha nodded, sighing deeply.

"Knew what?" I asked her nervously.

"You haven't been eating. That's why you look so skinny and bony. That's why when I pulled your arm over, my whole hand could fit over it."

"What?" I ask, faked shocked, "Of course I eat! I-I love food!"

"Cut the bullshit, Y/N," Natasha folded her arms.

I took a deep breath and put my head in my hands.

"Fine, I haven't been eating," I admitted.

I could hear everyone's sighs and disappointment with me.

"How long?" Natasha demanded.

"W-what?" I looked up to her.

"How long since you've had a real meal, Y/N?"

"2 m-months..."

"Oh my god," Natasha slumped in sadness, "I'm so sorry." Natasha pulled me into a hug. She pulled back and cupped my cheeks, "Why?"

"B-because I hate the way I look, and if I were skinnier..." I trailed off...nervous to tell her the real reason.

"If you were skinnier what?"

Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked in her emerald eyes, "Maybe you'd love me..."

Natasha's eyes filled up with tears, "Y/N, I have always loved you."

"R-really?"

Tears came out of her eyes and she smiled, "Yes, really!"

Everyone smiled, and then looked at me.

"We'll help you," Steve said, "All of us. We want you to get better."

"Thank you," I smiled, turning my head to Natasha, "Thank you."

Man, I really loved my family.

Most importantly, I loved Natasha.