All Because of This (a.i. m.c.)

all because of apologies

hi guys. how are you???? linn took 5478932658432897 years to update and i apologize.

i have school tomorrow and i haven't finished my homework whoops. my history project is also basically a fanfic and my teacher doesn't know tehehe.

i also updated the account. sister daniel is our new profile picture love it.

THANK YOU FOR THE 900 READS I'M SCREAMING I LOVE YOU ALL HGFHDHUIVRDUSGH!!!!!!!!!

anyway, on to the short little update.

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Triggers: Implications of suicide, mentions of self-harm

To: ashestoashes@gmail.com

from: cliff_fuckoff_ord@gmail.com

ashton,

let it be known i'm crying as i write this. i'm crying so much.

but this is my apology.

i'm sorry that i picked your name from that hat ash.

i'm sorry that my keyboard is broken.

i'm sorry that i'm from america.

i'm sorry that i'm broken.

i'm sorry that i keep breaking.

i'm sorry i sucked you into this.

i'm sorry that i looked for relief in pain.

i'm sorry that i liked what my blood looked like running down my hip.

i'm sorry that calum had to deal with me.

i'm sorry that you found me at my worst.

i'm sorry about everything that happened to you.

i'm sorry for my mother.

i'm sorry my dad hated me.

i'm sorry your dad is trying to come back.

i'm sorry for all i've done.

and lastly, ashton;

i'm sorry for what i'm about to do.

i'm sorry i won't be able to help you.

i'm sorry i won't be able to answer.

i'm sorry for how much this will hurt you.

i'm sorry to leave you lonelier.

i'm sorry that you won't get to read my note.

i'm sorry that i might trigger you.

i'm sorry that i couldn't hold on.

i'm sorry that i'm letting go.

i'm sorry ashton, i'm sorry i can't stop myself.

goodbye ashton. goodbye.

michael.

p.s. i'm sorry but there is a song i wrote for you, and i'm sorry i never got to record it, but ask calum about it, he helped. it was almost done, too, but i'm sorry i didn't finish it.