For You | Eren x Reader

Chapter 11- Visitor:

When help arrived, I wasn't allowed in the ambulance. I tried to push my way through, following as Eren was carried away, but Jean held me back, imprisoning me in his arms, a pained and deformed expression plastered onto his face.

My friends brought me back to my dorm, all with pale, scarred looks on their faces. They stayed with me the entire night, Jean and Connie sleeping on the floor. An empty silence hung in the air. I could tell we were all still awake: our breathing was still quick. There was no chance I could sneak out to see Eren. Sasha kept me glued to the bed and held me there until morning as I shook and cried.

"We'll see him tomorrow," she mumbled softly.

But what if we don't? What if we visit and there's nothing left of him?

I tried in vain to push those thoughts aside as the night passed me by. When morning came, I left early. Sasha, Connie, and Jean would come by later.

I arrived at the ER at 7:30 AM. Visiting hours began at 8 AM, but I didn't want to be late. Of course, I was turned down at the front desk, so I sat alone in the empty white waiting room, unable to stay still because of my anxiety. I checked my phone again: 7:34. Practically no time had passed. I heard the hospital door open across from me and snapped my head upwards. Unfortunately, whoever exited was not a person with the authority to let me in early to see Eren.

It was a black-haired girl, probably around my age, with almond-shaped gray eyes. She, too, carried a similar flat expression like Eren. Her eyes darted over to me immediately.

"Who are you?" she asked bluntly, pulling her red scarf tighter around her neck and smoothing out her gray coat.

I raised my eyebrows slightly, surprised by her forward interaction. Since when was it her business who I was?

I answered anyway: "(F/N) (L/N). I'm waiting to see a patient."

"Which patient?"
I looked towards the nurse to see if I was allowed to answer that question. Unfortunately, she wasn't paying attention. The black-haired girl stared at me harshly, waiting.

"... Eren Yeager," I said.

"He's sleeping. Come back later."

"No," I said resolutely, "I'll wait here until he wakes up."

She stepped towards me. "Who do you think you are?"

"An enemy, most likely, given the way you're treating me," I replied. She didn't respond, so I continued, feeling an odd desire to press my luck. I had a feeling this girl had already known what had happened, so I wasn't fearful of revealing information. "Yes... Definitely an enemy," I mused. "Eren wanted to die, after all, and I got in the way of that."

The girl's expression, though still cold, changed slightly. Before I could register anything, she crashed into me and swept me into the air, suffocating me with... a hug?

How is she so strong? I thought as I was crushed in her arms, still hanging above the ground.

"Thank you," she mumbled softly into my shoulder. "Thank you." The girl dropped me and pulled away, wiping away the tears that were pooling in her eyes. "I'm Mikasa Ackerman," she said, extending a hand awkwardly. "I'm Eren's sister."

Sister? They don't look much alike...

"I go to Sina college," Mikasa said. "It's a private school, right by the beach you were at yesterday, when..." she trailed off.

I nodded. Sina was one of the top colleges in the area. If not the top college.

"Are you a freshman?" I asked, trying to take Mikasa's mind off of Eren.

"Yes," she took a seat tiredly and put her head in her hands. "... I was right there, you know. I had planned to visit him... to check in, but... school has been so difficult lately... and Armin—" Mikasa's sigh deepened. "I don't know what to do."

"You can't spend time regretting it now," I consoled, taking a seat beside her and resting my hand gently on her shoulder. "There was no way you could have known."

Why am I telling her this? It's not like I believe any of it. Of course, I could have known. If only I had bothered to pay attention. The mood swings, the dark expression, the long sleeves despite the heat, the... everything. It was so obvious. I felt like a fool for missing it.

"You're wrong," Mikasa said, shrugging my hand off. "I could have known. If I had just bothered to step outside of my own pathetic world and look at him for once." She repeated what I had been thinking. "I hate myself!" She screamed. "I'm such an idiot! How could I?!" Mikasa turned to face me, tears falling freely, a look of agony on her face. "What is wrong with me?!"

"I—" I stopped, unsure of what to say. I had always been bad at consoling people, and I had always been bad at lying. I felt the same as her, and to say otherwise to make her feel better would be unconvincing at best.

"I don't know," I said honestly. "But, I made the same mistake."

"It doesn't matter," Mikasa argued. "I'm his sister. I should have seen this coming."

"Mikasa," I addressed her directly and she stopped. "It doesn't matter who you are. There's nothing you can do. What about your parents? Did they have any idea? They are no less guilty than you—"

"Our parents are dead," she said flatly.

Oh.

"I... I'm sorry... I didn't know."

"It's fine. But their deaths are all the more reason I should've been there for him. Did I even think once about how that would affect him? No. I was selfish and conceited. I'm a fool. Maybe I should just d—"

"Mikasa!!" I grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. "Please! Enough of this. Belittling yourself isn't going to change what happened. Keep your head, and let's focus on getting Eren out of here."

"Do you... know why he did it?" Mikasa asked.

I pursed my lips. "No. All I know was that he was arguing about something," I paused, recounting what had happened, remembering the satisfied smile Eren had made after the rock had sliced through his skin. "I think he just did it because he wanted to," I concluded.

"Oh." Mikasa put her hands on her lap, expression blank. "It's almost eight. Do you want to go see him?" she asked.

"Always," I replied, standing up.