I always hid my anxiety from people. I found it more of a burden and people think differently than something that was literally wrong with my brain.
I was dating Yeonjun. He was an amazing boyfriend. We met in school and were friends first then our relationship slowly blossomed. He has been busy so I haven't seen him in a while but our 8 months are coming up soon.
When he has off days I usually go to his place since he just wants to be lazy and lay around or watch movies.
We were currently in the living room with all of the other boys, binge-watching kid movies. This was one of the things we did a lot to relieve stress as group therapy.
I started digging into my brain as I have been anxious and on edge for a few weeks now. I didn't even know what my trigger was and I am really good about noticing them.
I felt a lump in my throat and very nauseous all of a sudden.
"Um... boys, I think I am going to go home. Thanks for today." I quickly started getting my things together as calmly as possible but in their eyes, it was very panicky.
"(Y/N) baby is everything okay?" he asked me but that took me over the edge. I felt like I was being choked. I started gasping for air as my tears flowed down my face. I tried to talk but I was literally not able to breathe.
He took me to his room and started thinking. He had overheard me talking to Yoongi one day about my anxiety and what I had to do to help it. He hadn't told me that he knew since he wanted me to be comfortable enough to tell him myself.
He took some scissors nearby and cut up my shirt so it was completely off of my body. He proceeded with my bra. Once he had the pieces of clothing off of my body he picked me up and laid in the bed with me. I started breathing normally not feeling so constricted.
He laid there playing with my hair as I fell asleep for a whole hour before I woke up.
"Hey, baby do you feel better?" I nodded but then widened my eyes at the realization of him seeing me in a full-blown anxiety attack.
"I am so sorry you had to witness that. I will be more careful next time and leave in time." he looked at me as his heart shattered to pieces in his chest.
"No baby you don't have to leave or hide this from me. I am all in and I want to comfort you when you feel like this. I want to be by your side. It's okay to have anxiety, it's actually quite normal. Just don't hide it from me anymore. Okay?" I nodded at his words.
"Thank you" I pecked his cheek before turning red with embarrassment.
"Don't worry I didn't get a good look. I was more worried about you not passing out. BBBUUUUTTTT..." I pushed his head away giggling and shaking my head as he hugged me tighter, spooning me from the back.
THE END
