This is your life now (S. R )

31.

Summer's outfit
...

Spencer looked at her, he tried so hard to stop the tears forming in his eyes but he couldn't "Summer it's not your fault these things happen" He said sitting on the bed next to her "I was going to tell you I swear I just wanted to do it in person" Summer said starting to shake from how emotional she was getting "Hey hey Summer..shhh shh it's ok. You don't have to explain yourself to me" Spencer said pulling her into his chest wrapping his arms around her. "Let me take you home" Spencer said passing her bag of things, he helped her up off the bed she was a bit unstable due to pain and the emotions running through her body. They made their way out of the hospital to Spencer's car, he was so gentle with Summer almost as if she was a porcelain doll he didn't want her shatter into pieces he helped her get in the car and he closed the door. Making his way around to his side he got in started the car and made his way to Summer's apartment, the trip was quick but they both remain silent, it was a painful silence nothing knowing that they wanted things to have ended differently.

They arrived to Summer's apartment, Spencer ran around to her side helping her out of the car all the way up the stairs to her door he got her keys and let them in to her apartment. "Summer you should go have a shower just try and relax a little I will be out here if you need anything" Spencer said walking with her to her room she only had one bathroom and it was an ensuite Summer walked in closing the door behind her. Spencer noticed her bed sheets soaked with blood, he walked over and started to strip her bed putting the soiled sheets in the washing machine and re making her bed with fresh sheets he lit a candle to create a relaxing aroma and made her a cup of tea. He made his way over to the bathroom door to see if the shower was still running it was and he could hear muffled sobs coming from inside, the thought of Summer sitting there crying over something she couldn't control broke him he began sobbing sliding to the floor he couldn't hold this in any longer tears streaming from his face he only let himself feel like this for a couple of minutes before picking himself back up wiping the tears from his face, taking a deep breath and knocking on the door before opening it.

"Summer..I just wanted to check on you" He said and there he saw her curled up in a ball on the shower floor just pouring her heart out she noticed he was in the room and she sat up facing the wall "Please Spencer, don't look at me" she said with her back turned to him "Summer will you let me help you? You can face the wall the entire time I won't look at your body" Spencer said even though it hurt him to say that no matter what state Summer was in he thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. "..O-ok.." she said in between sobs. Spencer got undressed and got into the shower helping her to her feet being careful to not touch her anywhere that may make her feel uncomfortable she faced the wall Spencer grabbed the shampoo and began to wash her hair for her he took his time and was very gentle he grabbed the conditioner and repeated the same once it was all rinsed out he passed her a loafer with soap on it and let her wash herself she did and rinsed all the soap away "Don't wait for me Summer I got you out fresh clothes and one of the pads the hospital gave you go get dressed I will be out soon" Spencer said softly. He turned away from her giving her privacy as she got out and wrapped herself in a towel.

He heard the bathroom door open and close knowing she had the left the room, he began to cry again this time harder then the last. He had wanted kids so badly for so long ever since he lost Maeve, but now he couldn't help feeling selfish for being this upset over something he didn't even know about. He turned the shower off dried himself and got dressed, he walked out of the bathroom to see Summer curled up on her bed. He went and laid down next to her, "Summer I am so sorry this happened to you. We don't have to talk about it now but I am here for you when you're ready" He said placing a hand on her shoulder "You can't go to work tomorrow so if it's ok with you I am going to call Bryan and Chase and let them know what has happened" Spencer said "That's fine" Summer said quietly. Spencer got up and got his phone her group called Bryan and Chase explained what had happened and told them to send him the case notes and Summer's paperwork and he would do it for her and send it back to them so they made the cut of time Barnes had set for them, they were both completely fine with Summer not coming in for the next couple of days and Bryan said he wouldn't accept any cases until she was back they passed on their love to Summer and hung up.

He made his way back to the bedroom and Summer had finally drifted off to sleep, he laid down next to her pulling her close and drifted off to sleep as well hoping that tomorrow would be a better day and they could talk through this together.

AN: me crying for Summer, I love her. see you all soon xxx