From My Love to My Life (MXM) (sequel to From My Enemy to My Love)

Chapter 6

Vincent Kinsington

Chet sat on the kitchen counter. He kicked his feet lightly as they dangled in the air. The lemon chicken I was cooking was almost finished and I was cutting cucumbers to put them in a salad. Goldie watched us from nearby but we had taught her not to come into the kitchen while I was cooking.

"Do you want some help?" Chet asked for the second time since I started dinner.

"I've got it," I said. He wasn't a bad cook, but he wasn't as good as his father. I was the better cook and I liked cooking so it worked out. I put the cut cucumbers into the salad and then I started to wash the cherry tomatoes.

"Do you remember the last time we looked at rings together?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said. "It was a while ago."

"Do you want to go look at rings again?" he asked.

I glanced at him quickly before turning my attention back to the task at hand.

"We can do that," I said.

There was a long silence as I finished washing the tomatoes and put them in the salad. I tossed the salad before going to the fridge to take out the ranch dressing. I put the salad and ranch dressing onto our little table.

"It's almost time for your brother's wedding," Chet said.

I paused as I passed him on my way to get the croutons because he seemed a little too serious about a conversation with rings and my brother's wedding.

"It is," I said, now giving him my full attention.

"Your mom and dad will be there," he said.

I swallowed. "Yeah," I said.

"Do you think maybe some reconciliation can happen there? I mean, we're all going to be there for Aiden. You can't avoid each other. I guess you can but that would look silly if they completely ignore you considering you're Aiden's best man not to mention only brother and they're his parents. There will be a speech and family photos and stuff. At the very least you're going to have to stand next to each other."

I stepped in close to him, put my hands on his thighs and pressed my lips to his to get him to stop talking. I didn't usually get panic attacks anymore, but that familiar feeling was coming on again just at the mention of being with my parents. Being with them, but ignored by them. It wasn't exactly the same as it used to be. I used to be afraid that they would disown me, that I couldn't make any mistakes, that I couldn't reveal my true self to them. Now it was more an anxiety of being around them.

"I don't know what's going to happen at Aiden's wedding," I said. "I doubt my dad will ever acknowledge me let alone talk to me. He never talked to me much in the first place, but my mom..."

Chet's warm hands caressed my jaw as he pressed his forehead against mine. I lightly squeezed his thighs before I continued, "Part of me thinks I shouldn't care, that if she doesn't want to talk to me why should I even bother, but I can't just let it go, Chet. I've tried. I know she isn't a great mother, but she is my mom. I can't stop wanting her in my life even with all her flaws. I can't help but want her to love me. I can't stop hoping she will talk to me again. I can't stop the hope that maybe at Aiden's wedding she will say something to me, that she will want me back in her life even if it's something small like a phone call once a year."

Chet's arms wrapped around my neck as he pulled me into a hug. I let my forehead rest on his shoulder. The timer started beeping indicating the chicken was done. I left his arms to take the skillet off the heat. I stood there a moment unmoving. I heard Chet as he slid to his feet from the countertop. He approached me from behind and wrapped his arms around my waist.