Two Eyes Down

Sleeptalker

Hopefully I can change that.

Am I mad? Of course not. Am I worried? No, I'm fucking terrified. I care about Demi a lot. She's sweet and kind and funny. Not to mention I'm treated like everyone else is with her.

The thing is sex means something. It's the expression of love and care. The passion infused in every sweat droplet that comes out of the lovers pores. I love Demi. There's no question about that, but I don't know if I'm ready for that. Not yet, soon most likely because I hate to admit it, but some of the things she does turns me on like nothing else. The way her lips graze my ear when she leans in to whisper sweet nothings into my ear. The way her hands hold my neck when we're kissing deeply to keep my face in place like if I pull away I'll take her soul with me. The way when she sleeps next to me she unintentionally spoons me, our bodies forming into one mass of a dormant firework. Sleeping, but will awake, and explode into a million different colors.

I lay in bed, her head laying on my chest and her limbs wrapped around me like she's a koala bear. She's my koala bear. The steady, heavy breathes escaping her slightly open mouth that matches the increase and decrease of pressure against my side from her chest soothes me, but makes me restless at the same time. You know why?

That turns me on too.

Fuck me.

"Natty, Nat I don't want you to go. I'm scared."

The soft whimper leaving Demi's mouth breaks my train of thought's tracks leading to the destination of 'sexualish fantasies'.

Demi may know she sleep talks. But never what it's about. I should tell her, but honesty is all the conscience knows And You can't lie sleeping. It's hard to lie if you have no clue your talking in the first place. I like listening to her sleep talk because she says things she normally wouldn't say. Usually, it's about me, but sometimes she's scared and pleading me to stay with her. Like tonight.

It's rare for me to get answers to the questions I ask the girl in my arms during her slumber. It's weird for me since When I sleep talk I can have a conversation with someone talking to me awake.

Example: when Monica slept over my house as a teen, she asked the sleeping me if I was still awake. I said no.

All I can do is kiss her forehead and rub her forearms, reassuring her I'm here, and that I'm not going anywhere. What I've gathered from this reoccurring nightmare is that something is hurting her. I'm not sure how, but it's real enough for her to have beads of sweat run down her forehead and her to shiver like she's becoming hypothermic.

"Babe don't go. I don't want to be left alone." Demi whines as she nuzzles her nose against me.

"I'm not leaving anytime soon, baby girl." I say quietly, so quiet in fact that I can hardly hear my own husky voice.

"Hmm?"

Demi looks up at me, wide awake. I feel her chin on me, clearly expecting me to repeat myself.

"Umm, nothing."

"Oh I know what you said. You can't pretend you didn't say it, I just want to hear It again." I could hear the smile on her voice, I feel her weight shift until two spots beside my shoulders had all the pressure of Demi's body. The air between us tenses until it's cut off completely by Demi's lips attaching themselves to mine. I pulled her hips to mine with my hands before deepening the kiss. Demi's tongue asks for entrance but I deny and pull away, but only enough to not be sucking her face.

My forehead rests on hers and I inhale sharply before speaking.

"We shouldn't get to deep into this. It's a bad time. You need to sleep. As I said, I'm not leaving. I don't know what you're scared of in your sleep, but I'll protect you from it. If you don't want to tell me that's fine but, just know, I will always throw myself in front of the gun if it's to protect you. Always.".

"How do you know about it? The nightmares I mean." She asks in bewilderment.

"You talk in your sleep. I'm worried about you, Dems."

"Don't be. I've been fighting the same person nearly as long as I can remember."

"You said earlier it was them. Like there were many."

"It's one person. But they contain so much...evil, like an army of demons." The terror in her voice is obvious enough for my heart to ache and cause me to press her against me and give her a long hug. The silent cry of pain coming through her heaving body as it shook against mine dug Under my skin like a infectious disease meant to kill. It breaks my heart to know she's in hidden agony on the inside. It hurts more that I can't take her place. Worst of all I don't even know what it is. It's like showing up with a sword to fight a ghost.

"Well, whoever it is, I'll sheild you. I'll save it from them. I'll be your superhero" I say holding her.

"It's me." She mumbles

"What?"

"What I'm running from in my sleep. It's me."