Two Eyes Down

Box

I stand in a glass box, an elevator almost, that keeps going higher. I like being able to see, since I never can, but the elevation isn't making me feel good. Neither is my friend, Aiden beating the walls with his fist. That's how I realize what makes the glass walls have the glint of the sun sway. Their closing the space between them. It now makes sense for him to panic, he's cloister phobic. Considering the feeling of enclosed spaces and physically seeing the lack of space has never applied to my daily life, this terrifies me. We get higher, moving above the city I assume I live in. A football stadium says 49ers on the side, so my assumptions must be accurate.

Aiden's hair is a light brown, sides and back shaved. his blue, horror infused eyes, looking at the glass, through a single small clump of hair that wasn't held up by hair gel. He's really tall too, at least 6'3". His rainbow tank top blows in the wind that previously was nonexistent, looking for the source, I see the box is no longer a box. It's bottom is shrinking, the floor in which me and this gentile giant stand on becomes from a 8 by 8 to a 7 by 7 and smaller and smaller. Just as I look at him through my panic eyes, I touch him involuntary. His back against mine. The floor has become to small for us to stand on, soon, it will be too small for two people. I watch in horror as he falls, and I'm sure to follow. I take my last shaky breathe, preparing to fall from the ever increasing height. Just as my right foot begins to slide off..

I wake up, engulfed in total darkness, as usual. How could I fall for something that seemed so real, but was unbearably obvious to be false? I always have my grip on reality when I'm awake, but when I fall asleep and am absorbered in the darkness everyone sees, I slip up.

I feel around for my iPhone and and put it in the sweatshirt I wear. Next, my glasses.

I don't know why but I've always felt better with tinted glasses on. Maybe it's because it makes it less obvious that no matter how close I look, I won't see anything. Or maybe it's that people don't expect me to see something I don't believe is there.

I sit up and groan as I grab my cane and feeling my way out of my bedroom.

"Jenny?" I call. No answer.

I turn on the television and listen to silver linings playbook. I love it, heard it many times, but it never gets old.

I hear the door open and close followed by loud footsteps.

"Hey! You're up!" Jenny says all cheery.

"What time is is?" I ask

"About 10:40"

"Can you make me cereal?"

"No, do it yourself!"

"Fine, but your picking up the mess when I get neither the milk or cereal in the bowl." I say pissed off.

"Oh yeah I forgot, sorry. Give me a minute". I feel her arms wrap around my shoulders and hear her walk into the kitchen.

"How do you forget one of your best friends is blind?" I ask realizing what she said.

"Frosted flakes or captain crunch?" She responds, ignoring my question.

"Frosted flakes, where were you this morning?Your usually here by now."

"Oh, I was at the hospital with Nate. His allergies are acting up again. Speaking of the hospital..."I hear a bowl being placed in front of me.

"I met a guy named Chris, he's cute and nice, and like you." She says with a smile evident in her voice. I hate when people say stuff like that. I hate explaining why I hate it almost as much because I always sound bitchy.

"Oh so because I'm blind and he's blind means we're meant to be together? What the hell Jenny! That's not how it works! What would we even discuss? Listening to Mean Girls 1 verses Mean Girls 2?" I say angrily. She would have responded but I cut her off at least once per rant. You'd think she'd get it after ten years. "Oh wait! I've got it! He could say 'you look beautiful' to me and then we could laugh because neither of us know exactly how I look. And then I could say 'omg you look so dashing!' And we could laugh because again, neither of us know! The best part is we could grow old together and never wear anything because the other wouldn't see. At our wedding, we could say 'until one has sight do we part'. "I finish before gasping for air.

"I never meant for it to sound like that, it's just. I don't know. I'm sorry, Natalie." Jenny apologizes.

"Damn right your sorry!"

I lift the spoon with a bite of cereal but only get a mouthful of metal.

"Shit!" I exclaim.

"Natalie, I really shouldn't allow you to feed yourself liquids." Jenny sighs while dabbing my face with a napkin.

Jenny can be sweet, she can be annoying though. For example she asks me how she looks way to often to be an accident.

Luckily, I have multiple friends. There's also Dylan, Monica, Katia, Nathan, and Aiden. I used to think Jenny should date Aiden. Then Aiden came out of the closet. Jenny said 'you'd have to be blind not to see it'. She thought it was hilarious. I blocked her number for an entire week.

They are my little family. My actual family is totally oblivious to me, And I'm oblivious to them. I used to think it was horrible, but it's for the best. I'm doing fine, I assume they are as well, better than if I had stuck around.

My part of the duplex is on the bottom floor. Aiden didn't want me to die on the staircase. Jenny and Aiden took the top floor instead. Monica and Katia live with eachother, and Dylan is their neighbor.

I tell them not to look at me different, but sometimes they do anyway. Dylan mostly, because he's like my body guard. Helping for every issue. He knows that a lot is significantly harder without functioning eyes.

I heard the door open and close followed by a smash.

"Fuck!" Speaking of the devil.

"Smooth, Dylan" Aiden teases. Then I hear Aiden squeal and his tall, thin body hit the wall so hard the entire house shook.

"No fighting in the house!" I shout.

"Whatcha listening too?" Aiden asks after plopping himself next to me.

"Silver linings playbook." I say absent minded.

"Patrick looks frantically. Patrick accidentally hits mother. Patrick Senior beats the living shit out of his son for it." Dylan mocks the monotonous lady that tells me the visuals.

Once again, the door opens and closes. Katia and Monica have arrived.

"She's going to kill you " Katia laughs

"Don't say anything, she'll never know!" Monica states.

"Natalie, Monica drove into the mailboxes!" Katia shouts over the conversations brought by others in the house.

"I'm not the one you should be worried about. Jenny gets the mail, not me." I laugh

"seriously!?" Jenny says angrily

"It was an accident." Monica defends. She shouldn't even have her license, it took five tries, even with the driving schools practically handing them out to anyone that can turn it on. Even after she finally got it, it was taken away three times, once for too many speeding tickets -she had twenty two, sixteen unpaid-, another time for driving with passengers whe she first got her license, and another time she crashed into tree because she almost hit a biker who was in front of her. Her now army boyfriend Wanye said he was in front of her because she was inches away from the edge of the sidewalkless road.

I can tell there is a pointless arguement ahead. I know it will end with Monica buying a new duo mailbox post thing and putting it in, you think they would too, everyone here has broken or screwed up a lot of peoples things. Its a battle of the stubbornest every time. "Jenny, it's fine. Monica will just buy us new mailboxes and replace the useless one outside." I say, smiling because I already know I won. Almost everyone here feels bad when they try to cross me because Im disabled. I tell them not to, but they don't, so I might as well take advantage sometimes. Things end quicker and we can move on with our lives.

They bicker back and forth for a while, but I don't stay. It happens too often to be entertaining really, so I go to take a shower instead. Its the same thing all the time, this routine keeps me on top of things, because change makes things difficult, but I need something, anything really, to happen so it can feel less steady, That's all. I don't know why I think to myself like this so much, it's sad, I dont say it, but I still tilt my head to the sky, hoping someone, even if they can't necessarily hear me, understands.

----------------------------------------------chapter one!

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Sorry this chapter sucked. But Demi comes soon!!