Our Reflection

43• There's Such A Difference Between Us And A Million Miles

Cheryl Blossom POV

When I parked in front of Friederick's office building, my body was drenched in sweat. 

For the first time in seventeen years, I had an experience that reminded me that schizophrenia was not gone, it was still right there with me. 

I got out of the car and with my hands still shaking, I kept the keys in my bag, shooting towards the elevator.

I never liked them, I felt trapped, trapped, it was a cubicle held by steel cables;  I didn't feel safe. 

I ducked my head and wiped the sweat off my forehead with the back of my hand, drumming on the walls as the elevator went up floor by floor like a cramped tortoise.

"Come on, damn it! Why is it so slow ?!", I took a deep breath and opened the first buttons of my shirt, looking for air urgently. 

When I finally reached the floor, I ran to the office door and punched a few times until I heard the sound of the lock. 

I didn't really care who opened the door, I started walking around the room until I realized that it wasn't Friederick who was standing with his arms crossed, looking at me with a mixture of curiosity and irritation. 

"Who the hell are you?!"

I asked still wiping the sweat from my forehead and the man continued in silence.

"Are you deaf or dumb?!  Who are you and what are you doing in my psychiatrist's office?"

"Would you like to try to enter again? I am not deaf, much less dumb. My name is Sam, son of Dr. Friederick and I am also a psychiatrist.  From your posture and appearance, I assume it is Cheryl Blossom, right?"

"Who are you?!"

He continued serious and went to the coffee table, helping himself to a cup.

"Listen, I don't want to know if you're his son or a psychiatrist, whoever the fuck you are! I need to speak to Friederick urgently!"

"Listen well, lady, with all due respect, I am not going to send you to hell or a worse place because my education does not allow it."

His voice, keeping a serious and firm tone, started to irritate me. 

"So talk to me like I talk to you, understand? Now, answering your pleas, I need to inform you that my father is on sick leave."

"He didn't say anything to me."

"He had to go urgently, my father is not well.  Look, he gave me basic information about you and your sister, if you want a psychiatrist, I'm right here."

I exchanged glances with Friederick's son and rubbed my face, feeling my body soften. Having nightmares still awake left me drained, not to mention that I barely said anything. 

Before rushing here, I left Theo and Melissa at my parents' house and even thought about going to Château Topaz, but I remembered that Toni and Veronica had not yet returned. 

Perhaps the concern about them is the reason for my sudden relapse in relation to the disease. 

As I rambled on, I realized that Sam was paying attention to the Los Angeles landscape, not caring if I was about to have a nervous breakdown in the middle of the office. 

I walked to stand beside him and saw the sun beginning to set behind the Hollywood sign, leaving a beautiful orange in the sky. 

The truth is, I was dying to open my mouth, but I didn't feel safe with anyone other than Friderick.  Did Marjorie know that our psychiatrist was in bad shape?