Taste of Life

23

"Your passport, your laptop? You brought the tacos you packed? How about your water bottle?" Mom's panicking I think. Nakatingin lang si Dad sa amin. He's smiling like he's sending me away for good. Excited lang siyang masolo si Mom eh. Tsk.

"I'm okay Mom. Eli will pick me up and drive to Atchi's." I reminded her and gave her a hug.

"Okay. Call us agad pag nasa PH ka na okay?" She said and rubbed my back a little. When he let go of me, Dad just tapped my shoulder and whispered.

"Get your feelings straight about Eli." He gave me a small smile. Napakunot ang noo ko. We are walking now towards the entrance of the airport.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Don't be naive, Anak. Ravena ka, we don't give mixed signals." He casually said. I think the whole flight, hindi naalis sa utak ko yung sinabi ni Dad. Do I give mixed signals?

First few hours of the flight, I slept it off. Kumain ng tacos, umorder ng juice. And the next hours, I started binge watching a show. But to be honest, hindi ko naman talaga pinapanuod. Ginagawa ko lang background music habang nagooverthink ako.

Eventually, I found myself typing a life plan in my laptop.

"Ilang taon kaya kakayanin ng puso ko?" I murmured. Buti nalang pala my mom got me a business class seat kasi kung may katabi ako baka isipin suicidal ako.

I made plans for the remaining two months before entering the seminary. I even include hangouts with my friends. Pati na rin ang bonding with my pamangkin na ilang araw nalang eh ilalabas na ni Atchi.

I didn't thought I slept again, nagising nalang ako when someone's tapping my shoulder.

"Mr. Ravena we've landed." A flight attendant smiled at me. I quickly got up and carried my things. Gaano ba kahaba ang tulog ko? Habang palabas ako, yon lang ata ang binibilang ko.

I waited for my luggage and tried to text Eli na I landed na. When I got outside the gate. I saw Eli. She's wearing a white croptop shirt and a denim cullotes. Her usual outfit. But she smiled widely upong seeing me.

"Ohhh what an outfit." She commented. I'm wearing a black shirt and a checkered slocks. I got this from NYC. Actually, mom bought it for me.

Umiling lang ako at nilagay na ang luggage ko sa likuran ng sasakyan niya.

"Is this your new car?" I teased. I heard kasi na Auntie gave her a car for her upcoming birthday.

She didn't answer and wear sunglasses na kinatawa ko. Pangarap niya yan magdrive around with her sunglasses at magkunwaring girl boss.

"Bagay ba?" She asked and gave me cute poses. Lagi yang ganyan. Of course I had to take photos. Pang bati rin 'to sa birthday niya.

"You're really weird kapag nakasunglass."

She started driving, I was the one who taught her how to drive. Actually we both went to driving school pero Eli complained na wala siyang natutunan so even if we finished, nagtuturaan pa rin kami.

"How's school?" I suddenly asked.

"Ang importante ay buhay pa ko, Troye." She answered. Natawa ako. She hates talking about school now?

I started telling her about New York and that sa summer we should go together since we wont pay for hotel or something cause Lolo and Lola has a house naman.

"Crazy Rich Asian ba family nila Tita?" She asked.

"I actually thought of that pero parang hindi naman. Kuripot kaya si Mom."

"Feel ko talaga crazy rich asian sila. Diba si Tito Loel din?" She asked. Uncle Loel is actually crazy rich. I remember Atchi and I pranked him and asked him for 1M. We told him na Dad and Mom grounded us for a year and didn't give us allowances. He just shrugged and sent a deposit in Atchi's bank account.

Nalaman tuloy ni Mom and Dad since they get notifications kapag may transaction sa account ni Ate. Pinagalitan kami but Uncle Loel just laughed it off and told us to keep half of the money. I remember me and Ate buying useless stuff.

"Yeah I think magkikita kita kami sa operation ko." I casually said. Nanlaki ang mata ko when I realized what I just said.

"Operation?"

"Uhm let's talk about it later." Kinakabahan kong sagot. Sumimangot si Eli sakin but she nodded. When we reached a MOA, I told her I missed Manam so we ate there. Sobrang tahimik lang namin kumakain. Hindi ko alam if galit ba si Eli o gutom lang kami parehas. When we finished, she broke the silence.

"We can talk about it now."

I nodded.

"Remember the heart transplant is only good for like 10 years?"

"Yeah."

"Auntie Dani called noong nasa NY kami. She wanted mom and dad to start looking for heart or consider other options." Tumango tango lang siya.

"Ayun lang. So mom stayed in NYC for her lectures, reseaech and clinical trial all relating to my condition."

She closed her eyes and nodded.

"I'll fly back to New York if the trial is successful and if the 3D printed heart can work on me." I tried to keep my voice a little hopeful.

"When's the operation?" She asked.

"Just waiting for my heart to get tired, and hopefully not soon enough so mom can do her researches more."

She just quietly nodded.

"Please, don't be sad. I'm fine." I smiled to assure her.

"I know. Do you even have a heart now?" Pagloloko niya sakin. Umiling nalang ako habang natawa.

After eating, we went to Atchi's house. Of course Atchi and Eli teamed up against me about making them cry. When Ate found out about the heart thing, she cried herself to sleep. Kuya Ian had to call me the next morning to check if buhay pa ko.

Noong, nagdilim na, I tried to tell Eli na dito na matulog but she said she needs to be in class early so she drove back to España that night. Ate and I walked with her in the garage. We watched her drive away.

"You sure you don't like her?" Ate asked. Sinamangutan ko siya. Hindi talaga ata 'to titigil si Atchi.

Diary Entry #45
Lord, am I sure that I don't like her?