Taste of Life

30

I was stucked in my room. The dinner didn't push through because I told them I don't want to be sent off anymore. They didn't ask questions so alam kong gets nila.

I don't have feelings like these before, it'll just go away.

I just slept too much since Sunday. Today is already Monday and I need to pack a few things.

I need to get up but I couldn't. There are soft knocks on the door. That's mom for sure. Sinisilip niya ata ako every 2 hours.

"Can I just check your heart?" She has a stethoscope in her neck. I just nodded. I know she's worried. So for her peace of mind, let's go for it.

I sat up and she sat on my bed. She listened and looks at her watch. She sighed and folded the stethoscope.

"It beats okay." She smiled weakly. I just nodded.

"But I know it's a little broken." I chuckled atyaka tumayo to start packing my stuff. She stayed seated on my bed.

"You can tell me what happened. I kinda pushed that yacht date so I'm super guilty."

"I'll be a priest, Mom. I'm not supposed to have romantic feelings." I firmly said.

"I know that. I'm sorry for pushing it."

"You didn't do anything wrong, Ma."

"I love you, my bunso." She softly said. I turned to her and gave her a hug.

"Please visit me often." I whispered. 'Cause I'm sure Eli won't visit me so I need to see them often.

"Of course. I'll visit you every sunday and bring you homecooked foods." She tapped my back and I sat beside her. She holds my hand. We are both facing my closet.

"Are you sure you want this?" She asked without looking at me.

I smiled.

"Tuition's already paid."

"Your happiness is what we are talking about here not money."

"I don't think I can handle another pain from love. I'm just glad I kinda have a little taste of it." I chuckled.

"So you love Eli?" She's so careful on saying her name.

"Yeah, I think, I realized it super late. I thought it's sisterly love, you know but then I realized I don't love Atchi like that. I was just so used to it I took it for granted."

"Love comes in every form, Anak." She put her head on my shoulder.

"Do you think these feelings will go away?" I asked her. I needed to hear her say yes. But she didn't say that.

"It won't but you can try."

"Trying is okay right? I'll just practice and you know, fake it till you make it." I faked a smile.

"You are so brave. I'm so proud of you."

"Just like you Mom." I gave her a side hug.

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The next day is a little quiet. Dad gave me a hug before we went to the car. He's acting weird. Mom said he's sad that all of his kids are out of the house.