If the world wasn't ending || LeviHan

》Chapter 10《

PoV: Levi

Feeling them going with the cold water on the cloth over my face, I clenched my healthy hand into a fist, gritting my teeth a tad. It was embarrassing, why couldn't I just do it myself? It's not like I ever had someone take care of me for more than a few very poor years with Kenny..

Trying to focus on something else, I found myself staring up at Hange again. Watching their eyes how they followed their own hand's movements and their lips which muttered silent words incomprehensible for thus on the outside.
The hand on my cheek was to hold me in position, yet I felt some sort of comfort in their touch, like nice warmth against the feezing cold.
How their few lose strands of hair hung over their glasses rims or how I saw myself reflecting in them for a brim second.

If someone were to ask me what I was feeling in this moment, I wouldn't have an answer.

After a few more minutes, they backed away again, letting go of my cheek and putting the cloth aside of themselves.
"That should be it." Hange sighed, looking down onto their hands.

They looked tired. More than usually. It's already been like that since Moblit's and Erwin's deaths and they became Commander over the scouts. It was never a pretty view to see them slowly giving up on being their own person and losing themselves in the middle of it all.
It was a big responsibility to bear for one soul singlehandedly, so I always somewhat tried to help them, but I never succeeded because I didn't make it obvious I was even understanding what they meant.

Maybe I was just bad in portraying my emotions and in general letting people into my life with giving them a meaning to me.

I've always lost everybody, I couldn't bear another person's loss. Especially not Hange's.

"Thanks." I responded as I finished my train of thought, giving them a short nod as a response.
"I'm glad I could help." A weak smile spread over their lips as they finally shifted their gaze back to me.
"Okay." I said and nodded once more, trying to smile but failing on succeeding with it.

Hange kept looking at me for a brink moment before starting to put more wood into our campfire for making something to eat. No idea what they had in mind about that, and honestly, I would probably catch a shitty food poisoning.

"Oi four-eyes, what are you trying?" I spoke up and attempted to catch a glimpse of their work.
"I caught a fish in the river, so that's what I'm making us. I'm sorry if it's not enough in the end I'm just-," they paused and sighed. "I'm doing what I can. I promise." The brunette finished and pulled out a pocket knife with which they began sharpening a longer stick that was in their lap.

"I know you are, so don't apologize." I just responded and looked down to my hand once more. Useless. That's what I was right now.
"Can I help you somehow?" I asked and forced myself to sit back up again.

"Levi, you can't even walk or use your two hands," they pointed out and shook their head.
"But I suppose knowing you'll recover is already a greater help than you could imagine." As they were speaking they looked away again, impaling the fish on the stick and holding it above the fire.

"...Okay."