Ang Cheerleader Ng Buhay Ko [boyxboy]

Chapter 18

K E N T

The more I talk to Kevan, the more na nahuhulog ang loob ko sa kanya. His smile is really contagious, and the idea that his friends, especially Timmy, shipping the both of us puts a smile on my face.

Maybe Kevan is wondering why I've been smiling a lot lately. In the middle of our conversation over dinner, I noticed him blushing several times. Or I was just imagining things? But I swear his face flushed red — his ears too — especially when I looked at him straight in the eye, beaming the sweetest smile I could muster.

We're on our way back to his dorm. Of course, I have to drop him off to make sure he gets home safe. I've been staring and smiling at him too many times, and he's been returning an awkward smile whenever our eyes meet. Napansin kong nag change na ang mood ni Kevan.

I was wondering if I did something wrong? Bigla kasing nag change ang mood niya in the middle of our conversation over dinner. Kinakausap ko siya but he seemed distant, parang may malalim na iniisip. If only I could read your mind, Kevan.

I noticed that he's been toying with his phone, apparently texting someone. I gave him a questioning look, sino kaya katext niya? But I don't have the right to ask. Pero sinabi niya na best friend niya daw ang nagtext at hinahanap siya. I haven't met his best friend though.

Speaking of text, naalala ko bigla ang sinabi ng nagtext sa 'kin kanina. Should I tell Kevan na ba? Is it the right time? Pero what if hindi maging okay ang response ni Kevan? What if iwasan niya ako? I'm scared, but if I'll never try, I'll never know.

I continued driving. There's that awkward silence between us inside the car. I want to initiate a conversation pero parang di ko alam ang sasabihin. Hanggang sa narating na namin ang kanto papunta sa kaniyang dorm. As usual, sa may kanto lang ako nag park at nag lakad na lang kami papasok.

I wonder how it feels like holding Kevan's hand while walking. Ang sarap siguro ng feeling. But hindi naman mangyayari yun kasi di naman alam ni Kevan about sa feelings ko for him. It won't happen because he doesn't feel the same way. This is going to be another sad, unrequited, secret love story.

Pero possible kaya yun? Is there a chance for the world to see the love story of Kent and Kevan? If I tell him, will it change anything? Is it the right time to tell him about my feelings? Matatanggap kaya niya?

I felt drum rolls in my chest. How should I tell him?

I glanced at him and he looked at me at the same time as well. He looked as though he's waiting for me to say something. I forced the words out of my throat and said, "Thanks for the dinner, Kev!" with a forced smile.

He smiled and took a quick glance towards me. "Wala yun! Kulang pa nga yun eh," he retorted.

We continued walking until we reached his dorm. He asked me if I wanna come in, and I didn't decline. Truth is, I didn't wanna go home yet. I wanted to be with Kevan longer, long enough to find enough courage to tell him what I wanted to say. I followed him towards his room.

We were almost at the end of the hallway, and there was only one door left so I presumed it was his room. We were almost at the door when I felt a sudden rush up from my stomach down to my fingertips, and unwittingly, I suddenly grabbed Kevan's arm before he could open the door.

I didn't know exactly why I did that. Parang may sariling pag-iisip ang kamay ko na hinawakan siya na di ko sinasadya. What I did startled Kevan; even me, I got surprised by my involuntary action. Then before I knew it, the words came out of me and I heard myself saying "Kev, there's something I want to tell you."