Ruthless Obsession

Chapter twenty-eight

I don't even know what to say to yall rn... I'm thinking and thinking but I'm coming up blank. Just pretend I wrote a formal apology for my absence. EHEM, I am alive. anyways, um, sorry. There are lots of chapters left Ig. IDK thought I was gonna end it, but idk idk, maybe not. We will see, okay?  Alright. 

Just in case you forgot- in the last chapter Ruth and Angelo went to the hospital to get her stitches removed but they found unusual swelling so they needed an x-ray.  Then 'desperate-for-attention Ruth' was like ily to whats-his-face and he was like "ugh, I do love her but I'm not gonna tell shawty bc that's embarrassing, I was only ever in this for the tatas anyways". 

Google translate is telling me tatas isn't a word and that resinates with me. 

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Angelos pov:

I said it.

I told her I loved her.

At least I think I did.

It's all a blur now. Probably one of those memories that fade with indecision.

The day she started softening her expression around me, warming up to me, and saying my name gently, that day was when I ruined everything. It wasn't when I choked her half to death, it's not when I burned her, it's not the day I locked her in the cellar. That succession of events could never compare to what I robbed from her. Or rather what I will rob from her. She will lose her life because of me. And I will watch it happen. I will watch her take her last breath.

It's the sensation of a bad feeling. That's how I know and that's why I can't say those three words.

And with her death, I will be ruined, in every sense of the word.

They found a thorn in her side. A literal thorn. A single withered thorn, from a patch of white flowers no doubt.

They had to reopen her wound to get it out. We're back at square one with the healing process. The team of doctors that originally operated on her didn't know how it happened. They say if it had been left in there, she would've been dead within the week. If the infection would've spread, they would've won. they would have taken everything I've ever loved or cared about and I would have been destroyed. They came so fucking close.

I wanted to die hearing that. I wanted to kill someone.

Knowing what could've happened to her made the air inside of the room constrict. Every doctor was a target. Every step I had taken had to be reevaluated. Every move I made was a regret.

There was an entire meeting that I was present at. It was about the next step. They said I could sue. They said if I wanted to, I could take legal action, but I'd rather focus all my energy on finding out who's doing this. Besides, they had no hand in the thorn in my wife's side. I know that, and they know that. But it was still a mess up on their part. I had to hold myself back from tearing their throats out in that stuffy office room. One of them offered me a glass of water and I almost threw it at them.

She's tortured about it. She woke up last night in a cold sweat, mumbling about white roses, her mother, all of it. I made her forget. Or at least I tried too. I wrapped her tighter in my arms. I wanted to take her panic attack away from her. I wanted to feel everything she was feeling so she didn't have to.

"I love you." She says as they roll her away for emergency surgery at Miami Hospital.

I didn't say it back.

I'm fucking selfish. It's to protect myself, I know it is. There are a million things that could happen in there. She could die. Like all those pets my father gave to me. Or the maids I grew close to. Like my brother's childish love for me. My father made me unlovable. He made me incapable of loving. He made my own mother look at me differently. Like she was scared of me, of who I've become. A monster just like him.

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She's unconscious now. I can't see her. They're keeping her in a private room to rest.

I sit across the hall from it, holding my untouched coffee cup. I squeeze my phone in my hand, deciding I must call Louis. I can't leave her alone, but I need to leave. That's all I know. I can't keep letting her steal my focus. She's a distraction. I've spent almost every day with her instead of working. I'm letting everything slip through my fingers and this is what I've let happen.

The consequences always come back to bite you in the ass.

He picks up. There's a moment of silence and then a strangled, "What's up?"

"I'm at the hospital," I say blankly. "It's Ruth, I'll explain everything later, but I need you to stay with her while I take care of some things."

I hear a sharp inhale of breath than an immediate response. "I'm on my way." The line goes dead. I put my phone back in my pocket breathing a sigh of relief. He's the only person I trust with her. He'll keep her safe just like I would.

The blinds are blackout in her room. It's nearly pitch black in here except for the light from the cracked door.

Her dark hair is pulled up in a ponytail and her rosy lips are parted. She's in that reached hospital gown again, but she pulls it off just fine. I'm convinced she would look beautiful in anything. I smile at her, pulling her chipped fingernails to my lips.

She sleeps peacefully for the first time since I met her and it's a beautiful thing to watch, but also unnerving knowing that I have not been able to provide that amount of peace in her life. I wish she always slept like this. I wish I had not caused each and every one of her problems.

When Louis gets here I explain what happened in detail. He reacts how I did when the doctors told me. Emotionless on the outside, enraged on the inside.

He squeezes his eyebrows together. His breaths are controlled, but fighting to stay that way.

Who would be fucked up enough to put a thorn in her bullet wound? It's what we're both thinking.

I have to find out.

I have to get out of here.

"She's safe with you right?" I ask, before texting Enzo and telling him to send guards up here.

"You don't even have to ask." He nods, sitting beside her on the bed. He's already zoned out of the conversation.

I can tell by the way he looks at her that he would die for her. My jealousy reeks its ugly head but this time I don't do anything about it. I'm glad he loves her. It feels right.

Ruth deserves more people in her life that love her.

She deserves a family and I'll be glad to give it to her.

Before I leave, I catch him sweeping stray hair from her face and kissing the side of her cheek softly and swiftly. The gesture makes me grin because at least Louis isn't as fucked up as I am. He has the emotional vulnerability I never had. He can tell Ruth he loves her, he can be there for her in ways I can't. I protected him from my father. I wanted to give him the life I knew I would never get.

It seems like it's paying off.

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Sorry again, pls don't kill me bruh.