Alter Ego [Karlnap]

Chasing the Ideal

2-1 Desires

Sapnap finished 'The Wild West,' the Inbetween sounding more and more like the place Sapnap and Karl were currently in. Maybe it was a different place, though, he would have to ask Karl. Speaking of the boy, he had returned from his latest travels, seemingly unharmed, though the brunet seemed a bit out of it, almost zoned out when Sapnap welcomed him 'home.' The more he reads these books, the more worried about Karl, Sapnap becomes.

The thought of stopping Karl from going on any more travels, at least not for a while, came to mind, but it's not like he controlled Karl and what he did or had any say in what he chose to do with his free time. Still, he wished the best for Karl and would be devastated if he got hurt or forgot him.

"I have a confession to make," Karl started, snapping Sapnap out of his thoughts to focus on today's daily visit.

"I quite enjoy these talks we have. I've been alone here for such a long time, such a long... long..." Karl trailed off, a frown on his face.

"At first, it was just a way to kill time, I wanted to learn more about another person; the first I've ever met. But now... it's like a reprieve for me."

Sapnap shook his head at Karl's words.

"It doesn't seem like that," Sapnap responded, his expression blank.

"It doesn't seem that way? Really? I'm just not very expressive. Now, I'm going to have you answer 12 questions. Don't think too hard, answer quickly and honestly."

Yet another quiz, one just like when Sapnap first met Karl, a paper with the questions written down in neat cursive, and even the same pen as the one he used on the first quiz were passed to him.

(A/N: Once again feel free to answer the questions in the comments, I can provide your results as well if you'd like!)

"Are you punctual?"
- No

"Does your mood change at the drop of a hat?"
- Yes

"Do you take action before thinking?"
- No

"Do you prefer quiet solitude?"
- Yes

"Do you like bustling places?"
- No

"Do you enjoy the unexpected?"
- Yes

"Do you consider things systematically?"
- Yes

"Do you prioritize the past over the future?"
- No

"Do you have difficulty empathizing with others?"
- No

"Do you prefer to make a splash in life?"
- Yes

"Would you say you're a dreamer?"
- Yes

"Are you the type who doesn't get jokes?"
- No

Sapnap passed the pen and paper back over to Karl to review after looking over his answers, Karl taking the paper into his hands and reading over everything.

"Ah, so your..."

Karl paused, taking a few extra seconds to 'analyze,' just as he had done when Sapnap was first quizzed.

"Your ego ideal is... artistic. Follow your aesthetic, what you think and feel at any given moment is more important to you than anything else. You may tend to see the person you were just a few moments ago as a complete stranger. If so, that proves just how strong an emphasis you place on the present. However... to anyone else, you're just the same old you."

Sapnap felt like he was learning more and more about himself and changing every few minutes, but after hearing his results, perhaps he really wasn't changing.

"It may seem like a good thing to enjoy constant change, but others might also find you awfully moody."

Once Karl was finished speaking, Sapnap thought harder about his results, looking back on events in his past that were evidence pointing to this revelation Karl had just bestowed upon him.

"Quite the revelation, hm? That should explain a bit of what goes on in your head. It might sound somewhat strange to say, but... understanding one's own heart is not such an easy thing to do. The same goes for me, of course, I don't know myself, at all. In fact, I probably know even less than you do about... about my..."

Karl seemed to zone out for a while, Sapnap couldn't tell if the brunet was just thinking or hesitating.

"Yes, well, come back when you have thought on your results. I'll be eagerly awaiting your return."

Sapnap wanted to push for what Karl was going to say, but he chose to leave things where they were most likely supposed to end, he didn't want to upset Karl, after all. Sapnap stood, placing Karl's 'The Wild West' book down on the desk and exchanging it for a new one which read 'The Haunted Mansion.' Sapnap took a particular interest in this one based on the title alone, he was always into the whole ghost hunting thing and scary things, he would be sure to pay this book a lot more attention to detail.

Sapnap gave Karl a small bow, in which the brunet returned, before heading off to his usual spot in the library. Not only to read his newly obtained book but to process and think about his results and to further explore his feeling for the brunet.