18. Not a pity case

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"So you wanna tell me who that was?" Jeongguk asked. The two were now sitting in Jeongguk's bedroom, one on the bed and one on the revolving chair in the room, facing each other. 

"He's my doctor. Park Seojoon. Treated me ever since I was fourteen. I was his first-ever patient," Taehyung said and grabbed a pillow from behind him and slammed it on his lap, and settled his elbows on it comfortably. 

"Ohh...and you call your doctor 'hyung'?" Jeongguk asked. 

"Yeah...umm....when he first started seeing me, he asked me to call him hyung. He is the only friend I have, but I hate considering him as a friend because he is more than just a friend to me," Taehyung said sadly. 

"Ohh...." Jeongguk pulled his legs up on the chair and wrapped his arms around his knees. "And what's that thing about going somewhere every two Saturdays?" he asked, hoping he wasn't prying too much. He really wanted to know what was wrong with Taehyung. 

Taehyung sighed. "He referred me to a new doctor in Seoul when I went to meet him yesterday. This morning I went to the hospital to meet the new doctor. I generally go to Seojoon hyung every two Fridays, but the new doctor asked me to come every two Saturdays instead. Hyung called me to ask how the appointment with him went," he said. 

"Once every two weeks......"

"Yeah..."

"And can I ask wh-"

"No. Please," Taehyung cut him off before Jeongguk could ask him what was wrong with him. 

"Please, hyung," Jeongguk asked again. 

Taehyung looked down at the pillow on his lap. He didn't want to become a pity case in Jeongguk's life. Not when he was starting to feel something for him romantically. 

Jeongguk didn't seem like he wanted to know just because he was curious. It seemed like he wanted to help, and that terrified Taehyung more than anything else. 

Being debted to someone. 

"Hyung...."

"Please, Jeongguk. Don't ask me about it," Taehyung said without taking his eyes off the pillow. 

"Okay," Jeongguk said and looked at his nails. He didn't know what to say or how to continue the talk further. After about a couple of minutes of tense silence, he heard another loud sigh from Taehyung. 

"Cardiomyopathy," Taehyung mumbled and Jeongguk barely managed to catch the word. 

"What?" 

"Cardiomyopathy," Taehyung repeated and looked up to lock eyes with Jeongguk. "Basically, enlarged heart."

"Enlarged heart?" Jeongguk asked with furrowed eyebrows and a worried expression. 

Taehyung nodded. "It's a condition of the heart muscle. Makes it hard for the heart to pump blood and deliver it to the body," he said. "Also, my heartbeat is ectopic. It has an extra beat." 

"Ohh? Why is it hard to pump when it already has an extra pulse?" 

"I don't know too many details about it. I just know that that beat has nothing to do with how the heart pumps the blood. Umm...take an elastic band for example. If you stretch it beyond its limit, it doesn't work the same way as it used to before, right? My heart is like that. It is too enlarged to pump the way it is supposed to. It does have an extra beat, but the pumping isn't strong enough. It's a genetic condition," Taehyung explained. 

"Ohh.....was that how your mom...?" Jeongguk asked. 

"Yeah....she was scheduled for a pacemaker installment next week, but her h-heart gave up be-fore itself," Taehyung's voice broke and he looked back down at his pillow. 

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