A Court of Mysteries and Secrets

Chapter 12

We arrived in the sitting room and Mor immediately tackled me into a hug.

"I have a niece," she laughed, spinning me.

"What do you mean?" Cassian asked.

"You really haven't worked it out yet?" I asked, crossing my arms.

"Worked what out?" He asked, frowning.

"Oh my fucking god! Azriel is my father you dim wit!" I yelled at him.

He stared at me, dumbstruck.

"I have a niece!" he bellowed, scooping me into his arms and swinging me around.

I felt the room tense, he hadn't asked, but I knew in my heart he was safe, so I laughed, the room relaxed again.

So many aunts and uncles, this was going to get ripped away from me again. I took in all of their faces, they were all just like my other aunts and uncles.

Mor was like Alice

Feyre was like Jess

Rhys was like David

Cassian was like Robert

Amren was like Chloe

Not again, everything was black, they would die, everyone always died. I would let myself get close and they would be ripped away.

"Fay!" Someone was yelling.

I blinked and saw Azriel knelt in front of me, why was he knelt?

I blinked a couple more times before I realised, I was on the floor. I allowed him to pull me against him, I felt safe in his embrace.

"Are you ok now?" He asked gently.

I slowly nodded and he let me go.

"Want to talk about it?" He asked once we were stood.

"Feyre, could you go in my head, look at my nightmare from that night you found me, show the others if they want to know," I whispered, sitting down and putting my head in my hands.

She knelt in the floor in front of me and took my hands.

"You don't have to do this," she whispered.

"It will explain a lot, why I kept my distance, why I freaked out just now, and what caused it, I want you to know, I trust you with that, but I can't say it," I told her, and she nodded.

I felt her in my head before they all went still.

She wasn't showing me I realised, and I was grateful for that small mercy. Once she had seen it all I felt her leave, there were tears in a lot of their eyes and Feyre held me close.

"You all remind me of them so much, and you hold their titles, I can't lose you too," I whispered.

"We aren't going anywhere," Feyre told me, wiping the tears off my cheeks.

I nodded and she held me close while the panic let go.

"I should probably go and see Ressina before she completely freaks out," I said, standing.

"She knows you are with me and ok, but nothing else," Feyre told me, and I gave her a tight smile.

I walked to the shop and saw Ressina sat at the desk.

"Hi," I said quietly.

She got up and ran over, pulling me into a hug.

"I missed you too," I whispered, hugging her back.

"You have siphons," she said as she scanned me.

"Six of them, I may have burnt my bedroom the other night, so Cassian and Feyre took me to Illyria to get one, I ended up with six," I explained.

"Feyre told me that you have news, was that it or is it something else?" she asked as she took me into the back room.

"I found my father," I said as she made tea.

"Really? Who is it? did you meet them in Illyria?" She gushed.

"Woah, chill, my father is Azriel, so no, I didn't meet him in Illyria." I told her with a grin.

"The Shadowsinger? Well that explains the six siphons." She said, looking at the purple stones again.

"If it's ok with you I'd still like to work here, I love this job so much, and I hope being a powerful Illyrian doesn't change your view of me," I said, looking down.

"Don't be silly Fay, of course you can still work here, having some stones isn't going to change that," she told me, I smiled at her.

"I won't have them all on all the time, Delvon says I just need two," I told her, she nodded.

'Fay, could you come back to the manor, we need to talk to you about a few things,' Feyre said to my mind.

"I need to go, Feyre wants me back at the manor, but work as usual tomorrow?" I said with a grin.

"See you tomorrow Fay," she replied.

I walked outside the shop and decided I was going to try and winnow.

I focused my mind on the manor and closed my eyes.

"Fuck!" Cassian yelped.

I opened my eyes and saw that I was in the middle of the sitting room, everyone around me.

"Sorry, thought I would see if I could winnow, I aimed for outside," I said, looking at the floor.

"You just keep getting cooler and cooler," Mor exclaimed, pulling me down next to her.

"You wanted to talk to me," I said, looking at Feyre.

"Well, we all did, just about logistics," Feyre said, I nodded.

"You are more than welcome to say here, or move back to your house, it's up to you. As for jobs, again, stay with Ressina or become one of my inner circle, or both," Rhysand told me.

"If it's ok, I'd like to go back to my house and carry on working with Ressina, I have no place in your inner circle." I told him, he frowned.

"Of course you have a place," Feyre cut in.

"I don't, and you don't need to make up a title for me either, I'm happy working for Ressina and living in the cottage, even if it is a little burnt." I said, looking at my hands in my lap.

"You are part of this family Fay, there is always a place for you," Rhysand told me.

"Don't you get it, I can't have a family! Every time I think I have a happy family life it gets ripped away. I lost everyone because someone was pissed at the world, they were blown up! My parents died in a car crash just as we were all finally healing! Then I only had my brother, he raised me, kept me safe when I needed him the most, then he was ripped away because my mum decided I was better off here, in a totally new world!" I yelled, tears running down my face before I winnowed away, back to my burnt bedroom.