Autism Awareness: How I Overcame Domestic Abuse, Sexual Assault & Drug Addiction

Part 5: Drug Addiction

So before college I had a horrific time in high school. I was bullied left, right and centre. Their was only one person who made my life bearable if it wasn't for him I'd of probably tried to take my life more times than I did back then. He made my miserable life not seem quite so bad.

He got booted out of high school around year 9. School become worse without him backing my corner. I eventually got myself kicked out for threatening a member of staff. I was being bullied and they didn't do anything to help, I hated it.

So after exams we got back in touch, we spent a lot of the summer holidays together. One night near the end of summer he spent the night at my mums with me. The next day we went out. We ended up at Tesco. He wanted to have some make shift entertainment. So he decided to "steal" somethings. I am still ashamed to this day for what I did. I can't take it back but I can learn.

We went in and took some glow in the dark balloons. To this day I still don't know why he wanted them. He probably only wanted them because he knew he could take them. After we got out he said that he was hungry. I had the money but he said why should you pay for something we can take. I stupidly agreed. We went in, we took the goods but we got caught. The only reason we got caught was because I had a blade one hair cut and I was wearing an all grey tracksuit, the security guard told me that the thought that I was an escaped convict.

After that night I didn't speak to him again until college and as I said I ditched him because of that girl but that wasn't the end of our friendship. I wish I never went back but I did.

So days have gone by since she broke me, so I decided to contact him and apologise for dropping him like I did, he said he understood and asked if I wanted to go meet him. So I went. He was with one of his other mates that I'd met a few times over the previous summer. I hadn't seen this guy in about a year. He'd changed, I was broken and easily influenced, he used this to his to his advantage. That night when I broke down and told him what had happened he introduced me to his old friend Mary Jane.

I didn't smoke a small drag like before, I was Rasta burning that joint like their was no tomorrow. It took all my problems and troubles away. When I was high it was like I wasn't autistic, I felt normal. I had no anxiety's, I had no problems. It was heaven. I loved it.

In the time we hadn't spoken he had gotten himself into some major trouble. He had been involved in an armed robbery. At this point their was no worry that he was going to get into trouble for it so we didn't even acknowledge it.

The weed drowned out what my previous partner put me through so I eventually decided I could move on. At the time I was ready but in reality I wasn't. The drugs just drowned everything out.

Why did I think I was ready? Just weeks before I had the opportunity to sleep with a girl when my parents went on holiday and I couldn't. I don't know. I couldn't do anything with her so my best mate did behind his girls back while I was asleep. Some friend he is right? I guess he just used me because everybody else but me realised who he actually was.