What If's

CHAPTER 30

Today is the day.

He went into the idea of a garden wedding, I thought to myself. Of course, the bride must've love flowers. The place was decorated with pastel colored flowers such as Peruvian Lilies, Dahlia, Peonies, Roses and so much more that I couldn't even name.

We choose the seat in the middle, not too close to the aisle but not that far either. Just enough for us to see the entourage and the bride.

The venue is vintage inspired with rustic and modern touches. A straight out-of-a-fairytale wedding if you ask me. All the guests are required to wear something white, to blend in the places' aesthetics.

If I am myself two months ago I don't think I'd be able to stay in this place for more than five minutes without breaking down. If anything, it could be a scene from an overrated telenovela where the ex-lover which is me would probably cry her heart out if not, beg the guy to take her back. But no, I am so not doing that. What for? I've moved on and this guy beside me helped me in the process.

Some people might think that it's weird for me to be here for I am the grooms' ex. Hindi naman kasi hindi rin naman nila ako nakilala. Secret 'yong relationship namin kaya hindi niya ako napakilala sa mga relatives nila. At 'yong immediate family niya namely mama at papa niya ay wala naman talagang pakialam kung ano man ang meron sa amin noon. Kaya napaka-dramaless talaga ng pagpunta ko sa kasal na 'to.

Not long enough, the ceremony began. The bride's maids walked the aisle in their chiffon infinity dresses matched with pretty flower crowns in sync with the beautiful melody played by the band of strings and quartet.

As I roamed my sight throughout the place, I somehow envied her. Not because she married him, no. But because this was my dream wedding. Not exactly but this is something like what we had thought about when we were still together.

It's funny how things took their turn. It seemed like only yesterday we are planning my dream wedding and how he's willing fulfill it when time comes. Crazy how naïve we were thinking about our possible future together under the old willow tree in the park not having the slightest idea that we would end tragically.

"Hey, everything okay?" I smiled at him. Actually, I never imagined that I'd attend his wedding if I was not bride but again, I'm here, as a guest and as a friend.

"Yep, I've never been better." The smile on his face tells me that he's happy with my answer. With him I don't need to explain because one look and he gets me, he understands what it means rather than the simplicity of the word.

He then suddenly took my hand in his and entwined them. If this was me two months ago, I'd totally do anything just to break free from his grasp but now's different.

My attention was then caught by the man in beige colored three piece suit who's making his way towards the altar. There he is.

Muli pa ay naramdaman ko ang paghigpit ng hawak ni Joshua sa kamay ko na lihim kong ikinatawa. What a jealous guy.

I watched Ryan as he stand in front of the altar with those captivating smiles and cute dimples that once made my heart flutter. The glimmer in his eyes shows how happy he is. As I stare at him, waiting for his bride, I felt a sense of relief. So this is what it feels like to be truly happy for someone who has been a part of your life. Even today's weather feels the same as I am as it is so clear as if the skies too is happy and celebrating their union.

A new melody is now being played, this time it's a classic by Johann Pachelbel, Canon in D.

We all diverted our attention to the makeshift doors as they open, and it revealed the bride, in her white long laced mermaid wedding dress. This is not the first time I've seen her but looking at her right now feels like the first time. She already looks angelic in casual clothing but her in a trailing dress, she's perfect.

She slowly made her way through the aisle, taking her time. Looking all pretty and glowing. When she reached her groom everyone clapped in joy, everyone including me.

"When it is your turn, I would probably be so happy I'd cry." Napatingin naman ako sa kanya na seryosong nakatingin sa harapan. Hindi ko mapigilan ang ngising unti-unting namumuo sa aking labi.

"Talaga lang ah. Pag ikaw hindi umiyak, lalayasan talaga kita," pabirong pagbabanta ko sa kanya na mukhang ikinagukat niya. Bigla na lang siyang tumingin sa akin na may napaka-seryosong ekspresyon sa mukha na tila 'di makapaniwala sa kung ano man ang sinabi ko.

"You wouldn't dare." Natawa nalang ako dahil mukhang sineryoso niya na ang banta ko. Walang sabi kong pinisil ang kanyang pisngi na naging dahilang nang pagngiwi niya.

"I probably would, so you better keep your word mister and cry on our wedding day. Got that?" Mas lalong lumaki ang ngisi ko ng tumango siya na parang bata. Hay nako Lopez, what am I gonna do with you?

"I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now kiss the bride," the presider said. The sounding applause from all of us marked the beginning of the newlywed's journey as husband and wife.

Everyone cheered for them and congratulations were echoing.

So this is it. The new chapters on both our lives commenced.

"Shall we?" he asked as we rose from our seats. I don't really intend to stay longer so I said yes. "Okay, wait for me. I'll get the car."

I busied myself in looking at the happy faces around me when someone called for me, "Alex." I am surprised to see the groom himself making his way towards me. "I'm so glad you came." I offered him a smile before uttering a reply.

"Congratulations."

He smiled back. "What are you doing here? You shouldn't leave your wife you know, it's your wedding day pa naman." I did my best to say it in the most casual way possible.

"Oh it's okay, she sent me here to entertain you guys but she'll soon follow," he said. "Where's Lopez by the way?" There's a weird tone in his voice that I couldn't explain, maybe my imagination.

"You missed him? Last time I checked you guys seemed to have a beef with each other." As I remember it clearly, they both kinda' hated each other's guts.

"Well no offense but your man's a dick." I was shocked by his choice of words but I concealed it by awkwardly smiling. Yep, they definitely hate each other.

"Looks like you two had it rough, huh." He just smiled and stared into oblivion as if remembering something from a distant past.

A faint laugh escaped his lips, "Well, siguro masyado ka lang niyang binabakuran that time na binugbog niya pa ako dahil daw pinapabayaan kita." He even massaged his jaw as if reminiscing the pain. "Even after your mother talked to me he came to my house, he threatened me and asked me to let you go because he said I'm only making things worse. And that he knew that you'll never be happy with me, well we both know." He stopped for a moment and smiled.

"Though he promised me he'll look after you and that he'll protect you more than anything else. And seeing you right now, I think he kept his promise." His revelation immobilized my being. What in this fucking world did he just said?!

"He might be a prick but he loves you. What's taking him so long anyway, well I have to greet the other guests." He turned his back at me, but stopped. "I wish for your happiness too, Alexandra." One last smile before he disappeared in the middle of the crowd.

I stood there frozen. Trying to absorb the shitload of information that stupid Revilles dumped unto me. My mind is going crazy. So many questions and so many curses that needs to be heard.

Sa puntong iyon ilang salita lang ang malinaw sa isipan ko at 'yon ay; Tangina mo, Revilles! Tangina mo, Lopez!! TANGINA NINYONG LAHAT!!!!!!!!

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