Serendipity (Dauntless Series #3)

Chapter 35

Akala ko magiging maayos na ako pagkatapos ng ilang sandali, ngunit hindi pala. Para akong batang nahihiya dahil katabi ang crush niya. Manilka acts like what happened earlier doesn't bother them, meanwhile there's me who couldn't find a way to calm myself. 

"Okay, Guia, you're next. Ikaw na lang ang hindi pa nakakapaglaro," sabi ni Marianne.

Tumango ako. Tinungga ko iyong alak na kakalagay lamang ni Levi sa baso ko bago siya hinarap. I chose truth. And even if I already anticipated that question, I'm still surprised that it landed on me.

"Have you ever had a one-night stand? If so, what was the experience?"

Lahat ay bumaling sa akin. Mabilis kong sinulyapan si Manilka sa tabi ko na naghihintay din ng sagot. I bit my lip and sighed. Bahala na.

"It's not really a one night stand but I deeply regret it."

I didn't elaborate it anymore. Mabuti na lamang at hindi na sila namilit at nagtanong pa. My hand slid down to Manilka's hands and held it tight. We're both wearing thick gloves so I can't feel their warmth, but it seems like they kind of grew distant from me. I have to tell them the truth. They have to know.

Nang matapos namin ang isang bote ng alak ay nagpaalam na si Manilka na babalik na siya sa tent niya. They only tapped my shoulder before walking away. Brianna nudged me. Agad akong tumayo at lakad-takbong sinundan si Manilka.

"Manilka, wait!"

They didn't look back. "I'm tired already, Guia. You should sleep, too. Maaga pa tayo bukas."

I threw my head back. I don't really know how to tell them about what really happened to Seamus and I, but they deserve to know the truth whether I like it or not. Sa isang banda ay naiisip ko na hindi kaya gusto kong sabihin sa kaniya ang nangyari dahil masyado na akong nabibigatan dito? Na hindi pa sapat iyong ginawa ko sa kaniya tatlong taon na ang nakalipas at dinagdagan ko pa ng panibagong katangahan?

"I'm so sorry, Manilka. I made a mistake months ago..." panimula ko. Bahala na kung anong mangyari. "Seamus and I... we..."

"I know. He told me."

Natigilan ako. Hindi ako makapaniwalang tumingin sa kaniya. I was in denial at first, but when Manilka only stared at me, that I confirmed that they're not lying. Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba akong matuwa na alam niya na ang totoo. If they already knew it, then why didn't they confronted me about it? 

"Since when do you know?"

"Before I arrived in Manila. I got mad, yes, but there's nothing I could do to change that. We used to date each other's exes before, but you're different, Guia. I can't stand seeing you with my best friend... Imagining you two kissing each other is torture to me."

Mas lalong bumigat ang dibdib ko. Their voice broke in the middle of their talking. I can't imagine them hurting because of me. Come to think of it, all I did was hurt them. I want to go back in time and right my wrongs. If only that was possible.

"I feel like I cheated on you. Seamus didn't deserve to be a rebound, but I treated him like one. We both did it to each other."

"You did nothing wrong. We weren't together that time."

Tumango ako at tumikhim. "I know, but all I could ever think about at that moment was you."

Nagtagal ang kaniyang tingin sa akin. Hindi ko alam ang kaniyang iniisip dahil hindi ko mahanapan ng emosyon ang kaniyang mukha. They are really intimidating and them looking at me like that was like staring right into my soul.

"You're not just any other girl to me, Guia. When you told me about the things that you had endured in the past, I swore to myself that I will treat you right. You are too precious for this world. Even I thought that I don't deserve you, but I want to prove to you that with me, my love is the only thing you'll think about. The rest are just dusts."