Euphoria

15: Sober Minds

"Jeon..."
Her voice breathy. They were close. She could feel his heartbeat. Her breath hitting his neck.
He jumped back to his feet, lending his hand to the lady,
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do any of this..."
"Relax, Jeon!"
She chuckled, getting up. Her hand in his,
"Besides, you were lot more closer last night than today."
She dusted her hips and smiled at him. Even though breaking inside.
He choked on thin air. He started coughing, trying get his words out,
"Wh-what do you mean? Did we sleep together?"
A sudden seriousness flowing in his veins. How can he forget a night spent with HER? How did he even spend a night with her? Did he force her? What if he did? He wasn't himself! He could've forced himself on her. He could've hurt her...
She cut the string of thoughts, with her confident voice.
"Nope. But you are a tease to be honest."
"What did I do Maya? Please tell me. You're worrying me. Did I do something to hurt you? Or did I say something absurd?"
She looked him in the eyes, giggling. He was so drunk last night.

He froze halfways. Quickly covering his mouth. His eyelids heavy from the alcohol.
"I smell of alcohol. Maybe you wouldn't like it."
Maya cocked her eyebrows, was he serious?
"Yeah, now wear something and please head to bed."
"You can still hold me in your arms, ya'know?"
With that he wrapped his arms around her into a bear hug. Squeezing Maya between his strongs self. Maya felt warm in his embrace. She, hugged him back. It just felt nice.
"I don't feel so good. My head feels heavy and dizzy."
He mumbled, before flopping down on the bed and quickly passing out.

"Maya, tell me, did we sleep together?"
He was worried. Maya felt a sudden urge to pinch his cheeks. He was so cute. But it was wrong to baby someone when they are worried and trying to explain a point. If someone's talking about something important, don't cut them off because they look "cute" when angry. Maya calmly said,
"I slept in the living room."
He felt as if a stone was lifted from his chest. He felt a bit more free to breathe. Maya sarcastically scoffed,
"Why? What would you do if we slept together? Regret?"
He looked at her. Seeing a glumness on her face. Did he hurt her while sober? Damn it!
He quickly took a step forward, lessening the gap between them. His hands took hers in them. His thumb rubbing her skin,
"Yes. I would regret it cause I don't remember anything that happened last night."
That was it! Maya couldn't help but blush. All the sadness at the bsck of her throat? She gulped it down happily. She didn't care how close he was. He was sober now. It won't matter if they kiss now. They are both in states of minds to consent.
"You did try to kiss me though, last night."
"Why didn't I?"
"Maybe because you were drunk. Good thing you backed off. If you didn't I wouldn't even have resisted you and would've shared a kiss without your consent. And you won't even remember it today. Good thing you backed off."
She fiddled with her fingers. Losing all her confidence in his embrace. She knew, if she only looked at his eyes once, she would be doomed to tell him to stay. Those doe eyes.
"Maya, look me in the eyes."
His index under her chin. He tried to lift her chin up so he can see her eyes. And melt. He just wanted to be as clear as water in front of her. He wanted to stay back with her, and tell her everything. If only their eyes met, he wouldn't hesitate to stay back one bit. He wouldn't think once before believing her. Whether she lies or tells the truth.
She moved away from him. She can never be his. Neither can he be hers. He can't just simply trust on her. She can't hold his trust. They are bound to hurt each other that way.
"Let's not Jeon. You can't believe me. I broke your trust. We'd just end up hurt."
"I want to believe you. Just prove me wrong once."
"How can I prove you wrong when you've already made up your mind?"
Tears triggering to fall any minute. Why was he messing up her? One second he loves her, and the other they are strangers.
She sighed,
"Let's not talk about that. I was supposed to avoid you. I was wishing to not cross paths with you. I thought it would be better to forget you or not see you... You know?"
Her voice stronger than lead. Her chin up and looking into his eyes. He patiently waited for her to finish. Cutting each other off would maybe add more to the conversation. But it would be better to have a comfortable silence than meaningless conversations and bickers. Besides, his eyes were clued on hers. He didn't care about spilling.
A few seconds passed with deep silence. After he was ensured that Maya was done, and waiting for him to say something. He smiled,
"I thought of letting you go, but I couldn’t. I felt like a loser. Who could neither hold you back nor make you stay. Even in my worst nightmares, I would never let you fade away. You'd always be my precious lover. My muse. In my most pleasant dreams, I would pursue you and we won't fall apart. But let's have it your way. Let's not meet again. Let's not cross roads again. Let's just fall apart. What am I saying? We were just strangers to begin with and we are going to end it with being strangers. Fair enough. If you say so. But I beg your pardon, cause every love song I sing would be about you. Every tune I hum would be a homage to you. May you forever be my muse."
He took Maya's hand in his. He stepped closer, as Maya sniffed. The taller figure dawning over her, she noticed the melancholy shadow in his eyes. She thought of it as a reflection of hers. Hee joined his lips on her fingers, like a gentleman. A tear glided out of his eyes.
"Goodbye. Hope you find love again. It was nice meeting you Maya. Goodbye."