Megumi's Flower ❀ | ɢᴏꜰᴜꜱʜɪ

[ XII ]

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A few months passed. It was the 70th night in the row that I was hunched over, throwing up blood and flower petals all over my toilet seat. Tsumiki rubbed my back soothingly, but all I could do was continuously throw up until my body got tired of it for the night and I could go to sleep. 

I still refused to tell Satoru. I couldn't. It would mean confessing to him, since it was so obvious that I had a crush on him. But I couldn't do that, since I didn't want to be rejected. Even though by having this disease I was already rejected, but I didn't want to hear it from his mouth. 

"Megumi, how long are you going to keep this up for?" She asked, worried. "I'm scared you'll end up dying! I know I promised you that I won't tell Gojo-san but you also promised me that you'll be okay-"

"Don't tell him!" I yelled. I coughed again. A few more flower petals came out of my mouth. "Plus there's no point telling him. You told me yourself that this can't be cured by modern medicine."

"But there's still a way to cure you!" She argued. "Um, what was it," she tried remembering what she read. "Either by falling out of love, having the person you love fall in love with you back, or finding someone else to love."

I coughed again painfully. "See, no doctor can help me with that. And Satoru won't be able to help me with that either unless he can love me back, which he clearly doesn't since he's always spending time with a bunch of different girls. Like tonight."

Tsumiki kept rubbing my back. "I can't believe you're really in love with him. It just seems so, what's the word for it? Surreal."

I looked down at myself, comparing my body to all the woman I've seen him with. "You mean unbelievable right? It's crazy that I'm in love with him." I said glumly.

"Honestly? Yeah," she agreed. "I think you might need to go for that first option. To give up on him. Because he's never going to like you back. You're a 13 year old kid and he's a 24 year old adult, and he's probably not even into guys since he's always going around with girls." 

She rested my head on her shoulder. "It would be better if you just gave up."

Tears threatened to come out of my eyes but I wiped them away quickly. "You're right. That's what I'm going to do. I'm not going to be interested in him anymore. It's never going to happen, so there's no point hanging onto these feelings."

I coughed up a few more petals along with some blood. It would probably end up taking a while, but I still need to give up on him. I have to.

Or else I would die. 

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