This Is Me Trying

Chapter Thirty-One

Betty

Monday morning. My first day back at work. Thank God Krista was nice enough to give me my job back.
I pulled out my phone and dialed Nora's number.

"Hi sunshine! How's it going?" She answered the phone.
"Great Nora. I go back to work today, thank God." I ran my fingers through my hair.
"You're nervous, aren't you?"
"Well, yeah. What if I can't do it?"
"You got this sunshine. Do you wanna say the prayer?"
"Please. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
"Just keep that in your mind sunshine. You've got this. Call me if you need me, okay?"
"Thanks Nora. I'll call you after and let you know how it goes."

We said our goodbyes, and hung up the phone.

"Good morning Bambina!" Stefania said as she walked into the kitchen.
"Good morning Mamma." I handed her the cup of coffee I had made for her.
"Grazie. Are you ready for your first day back?"
"Sì. I'm just a little nervous."
"You'll be great. Come on, your Mom already went to work. She had an early scene."

"Hey mija!" Jaina sat next to me as I was reading over my lines.
"Hey Tìa." I gave her an absentminded wave and continued to study my lines.
"Catching up on your scenes?" She asked.
"I'm getting stressed. I have so many scenes to film. The premier is literally three days away, and I only have three episodes filmed." I shut my script and threw it on the chair next to me.

"Hey, why don't Barrett and I come over tonight, and all of us can run lines together? Majority of your scenes are with us two, or Danielle and Stefania. We'll eat dinner and run lines. It'll be fun!" Jaina suggested while rubbing my back.
"Yeah. I'd have to ask Mom and Mamma. I'm sure they won't care though." I put my head in my hands and sighed.
"I just... I really want some fucking pills right now." I whispered so only Jaina could hear me.
"I know. I can see it in your eyes. But guess what?"
"What Tìa?" I looked up at her.
"I'm proud of you for telling me that you're struggling. You're doing great mija. And I know you have a sponsor, but you can always call me too if you're struggling." She pulled me into a hug.
"Thank you. I appreciate it. Can I ride home with you? I don't wanna be here any longer than I have to."
"Let's go ask your Moms first." She squeezed me one last time before letting go.

We walked hand in hand to Danielle's trailer, and I knocked on the door.

"Come in!"

We walked in and saw Danielle and Stefania cuddled up on the couch watching Jeff play with a squeaky toy.
"Hey Moms. Can Jaina and Barrett come over for dinner tonight and help me run lines? All five of us? I'm having a hard time dealing with all this stuff."
"Of course bambina. Do you want Chinese?"
"Is that even a question?" I laughed.
"Can I also ride home with Jaina? I don't wanna stay any longer than I have to..." I trailed off.

"Why's that kid?" Danielle asked.
"Mom..." I fiddled with my hands.
"Come on kid. Talk to us."

Jaina reached over and grabbed my hand.
I looked up at her and she nodded slightly.
"I got my first batch of pills from Jerry." I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair.
"Jerry? You mean one of the janitors?" Danielle asked.
"Yeah. I trusted him so I knew he wouldn't give me anything bad but-"
"I'm gonna kill him." Danielle got up and pushed past Jaina and I and walked out of the trailer.
"Mom!" I ran after her as she stormed into the set.
"Bambina! Think about what you're doing!" Stefania yelled as her and Jaina ran behind us.

"You. You slimy little bastard!" Danielle rushed over to Jerry and grabbed his shirt, slamming him against the wall.
"Whoa! What the fuck?" He exclaimed.
"I swear to God. I'm gonna kill you. You piece of shit!"
"Mom! Come on!" I tried to grab her arm and pull her off.
"She asked for them! It's not like I gave them to her for free!"
"She's a child! Who else do you sell to? Do you realize how many lives you're ruining?"

Jaina grabbed Danielle and pinned her arms by her side, and pulled her away.
"Let go of me Jaina! I'm gonna kill him!" Danielle was struggling to break out of her hold.
"Mom, come on. Let's just go." I stood in front of Danielle and tried to get her attention on me.
"You're done here. I swear, you won't have a job once I talk to Krista. You might as well get your shit and go the fuck home. Your life is over. I'll make sure you don't even get a job as trash boy at the local grocery store!" Danielle growled as Jerry ran off.

"Mom! You gotta calm down! Please, for me." I grabbed her hands and held them tightly.
"Jaina let me go. I'm good. I'm good."

Jaina released her hold on her and Danielle pulled me into a crushing hug.
"I'm so sorry I didn't realize. I should've realized." Danielle whispered as she held me tight.
"It's not your fault Mom. It's okay. I'm okay. Let's just go home."

Danielle

Stefania and I rode home in silence. Betty had rode with Jaina to pick up Barrett.
I unlocked the door, and walked inside. I felt Stefania grab my hips and pull me back, pushing me against the door.
"Danielle Kathleen Savre. Don't you ever do that again. Do you understand me?" She whispered as she got close to my face.
I closed my eyes and nodded.

"Although, it was very hot seeing you so protective over our girl." She added as she peppered lazy kisses on my neck.
"Yeah?" I asked as I tangled my hands in her curly hair.
"Sì. I could've taken you right there if nobody else was in the room."
"Nobody's here now..." I trailed off with a smile.

Stefania reached down, and lifted me up. My legs instinctively wrapped around her waist.
"Babe! You're gonna hurt yourself!" I laughed as she carried me to our bedroom.
"You're not heavy. Stop talking." She kicked the door shut behind her, and placed me down on the bed.

Betty

"Mom? Mamma? We're home!" I called out as the three of us walked inside.
We all stopped in our tracks as we heard the noise coming from their bedroom.
"Outside!" Jaina exclaimed as she covered my ears and led me out the front door.
"Geeze Jaina. I've heard what sex sounds like before." I rolled my eyes.
"How do you know what sex sounds like?" Barrett crossed her arms over her chest.
"I stayed the night with you two, remember? And this isn't the first time I've come home early and found them doing it. Besides, do you think I'm a virgin?"
"Nope! Not having this conversation!" Jaina said while covering her ears.

"I'm just messing with you Tìa. Of course I'm a virgin." I rolled my eyes again.
"Oh thank God. I was about to kick your butt."
"Why? When did you lose your virginity?"
"Oh hi Danielle!" Jaina diverted the conversation when Danielle walked outside.
"Sorry. We were, uh, we were in the shower." She nodded breathlessly.
"Uh huh. Come on, let's go study my lines." I laughed as I walked past her.