𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐩-𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫; 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐨

34

*Y/n POV*

Y/n: This is a picture of me when I was 3 I think and that's when I found my passion for singing.
I tell my dad.

After the incident in my room a few hours ago, my father wanted to learn about his daughter as soon as possible before the wedding. The wedding, that's going to be the biggest problem between me and Mattia. That will always be the biggest problem but, when he didn't lose his memories, we made sure the wedding wasn't going to get in our way.

I look up at my father to see if any of the pictures are ringing a bell. He looks at the pictures more and softly shakes his head. I wanted to break at that moment. I knew this would be hard, really hard, but my biggest problem is, how long? How long till they fully remember me? How long till I can finally have a normal conversation, remembering all the things I or we did either in the past with our old family or with this current fa-- fam-- fa.

I can't say the word since I love Mattia!

Y/d/n: I'm sorry--
Y/n: Nothing to be sorry about, I promise.
I let in a small sigh.
Y/n: Baby steps
I smile at him.

He smiles at me back. Baby fucking steps.

Y/n: Anything wants to know?
He thinks a little to see what he wants to remember.
Y/d/n: What about your mother? How is she?
Ouch. I thought he could at least remember mom but, I guess he doesn't either. I wanted to let tears swim down my cheeks but I didn't want to show him that this is a touchy topic.
Y/n: Oh well, she died when I was younger, I have very very little memory of her but, I just know she's doing better than ever.
Y/d/n: Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to ask that, I'm sorry.
I shake my head.
Y/n: It's fine, I promise.

I can't do this anymore. The tension in this room is unbreathable for me.

Y/n: Excuse me, I'm going to see how Xavier is.
He gives me a small nod and I quickly leave the room running to mines.

I run up the stairs with tears going down my cheeks. I can't do this. I shouldn't be the one recapping all the memories I remember for my father. It should be the other way around, he should tell me stories that I don't remember when I was 1 or how much I was a big crier when I was a newborn. Tell me stories when I fall off my bike or scooter and scream for my dad in pain from the scratch I got from the sidewalk. Not me telling him how I found my passion for singing, why I don't have a mom anymore, how I got certain scars on my body that I got when I was younger but those same scars still are on me till this day.

I forcibly open my door and already see Xavier there sitting on my bed with some basketball shorts but no shirt. Xavier was about to ask something but when he saw the tears on my cheeks he decided to keep his lips close. He opens up his arms mentioning my to lay down on him. I close my door with my foot and go to straddle Xavier. He places one of his hands in my hair, smoothing me but also, placing his hand on my back to get a good grip on me so I don't fall. I place both of my arms around his natural tan body and cry to his chest even more.

Y/n: I-I can-'t anymore Xa-avier, he doesn't remember anything of me or my m-omm
I cry harder again to his chest.
Xavier: Your mom? I thought they only didn't remember you
I sit back up so I'm straddling him correctly.
Y/n: Me too, but- but, he also asks for my mom and I told him s-he di-ed whe-n I was you-nger.

I felt anger, hurt, annoyed, felt like I'm suffering, irritating, and it's all because of fucking Nico. I wanted to let this hurt go somehow, I wanted to use something to let my hurt out. Xavier's thumbs rub my hips for comfort. I snake my hands around his neck and play with the back of his hair.