"wheres y/n?" i felt like i ran a 5k taking care of her drunk ass. she isn't a heavy drinker but it was her best friends birthday, its kind of a rule to get drunk on your best friends birthday.
"im right here." she creeped up behind me hugging my waist.
"you ready to go?" i said grabbing her bag. "where are your shoes?"
"lets fuck in the bathroom." she whispered in my ear. alcohol seemed to make her a fucking nymphomaniac, her sex drive was at like 400 miles an hour. we've been dating for a long time but i preferred having sex sober.
"we have a bathroom at home, ok?" i laughed. "where are your shoes?"
"heels are so annoying. i took them off."
"im aware you dont have shoes on but where are they?" i asked.
"um in my bag i think." i checked her bag and they were there. "you ready to go?"
i went to the kitchen super fast to grab a trash bag in case she got nauseas in the car, she was on the couch.
"dont sleep lets go!"
"im not sleeping dumbass." she said. "lets fuck vinnieee."
"we can do that later." do i want to? sure. can i right now? no.
we went outside to the car. it wasnt gonna be a long drive. probably 10 minutes
"why the sour face?" i asked putting my hand on her thigh as i drove. i made sure to not drive crazy, the last thing i wanted was for her to throw up.
"do you even love me?"
"of course i love you. you're the person i love the most." i said and she awed.
"dont say the most. you have to love your mom more."
"its different kinds of love-" i started my sentence and i just knew by her face that she needed to throw up. "do you want me to pull over?"
"yeah." she nodded holding her hand over her mouth. i quickly pulled over and she opened her door to throw up. i patted her back. i took a picture to laugh at it later, she always took pictures when i was drunk.
twitter : @vinniehacker dont kill me with you see this @yourusername
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***
"baby we live with other people relax." i said as she was trying to unbutton my pants.
"please ill never ask for anything again." she asked.
"you need to shower lets go." i said picking her up. once i got up to our room i locked the door, now that we had full privacy i felt safe.
"you dont love me ill do it myself." she said going into the bathroom. the first thing she did was brush her teeth. such a responsible drunk.
"i do love you." i told her.
"no you dont." she said taking his dress off. she was a goddess, she knew what she was doing. "why are you looking at me like that perv."
i laughed and turned around. "fine i wont look."
"good! bye! go stream or something!" i couldnt see what she was doing. i just heard her bang against the shower door.
"you okay?" i laughed.
"y-yeah." she said opening the door.
***
i woke up before she did, i took the time to get her water, advil, and a light snack. her hair looked she went on 9 rollercoasters.
once she woke up she looked sad at life.
"oh my god." she said rubbing her eyes.
"happy hangover." i kissed her forehead.
"my head hurts so bad." she said.
"i got you advil just in case." i said handing the advil and water to her.
"howd i behave? did i throw up?"
"only once. you behaved well, you were just horny." i said rubbing her head.
"im always horny." she said. "so not bad?"
"i got a picture of you. its on twitter." i said and her laugh dropped.
"vincent hacker- you little asshole." she laughed.
