Falling for my best friend, Jinjoo.

Chapter 14

Minju's POV

Her hands are cold...lifeless. Why now...Yujin-ah... Stupid dog. Why did you have to write all those when you're still here? Just wake up. Wake up and tell me everything. Don't be a fucking pussy. Who the heck taught you to write down a confession? You're supposed to tell it. Is this why she's been acting so...weird lately? Because she...likes me? She thinks I hate her? That's why she's avoiding me?

Why didn't I notice? How could I not notice? I'm her best friend and I should be able to tell straight away if she likes someone. I'm dumb. And now I know, she's here, lying unconscious with no guaranteed chances of survival. She's supposed to wake up. It's been a few hours. Why isn't she waking up?

I lifted my head and took a good look at her who's still breathing. But her breathing is weak...almost as if she wasn't breathing. Her eyelids...they're flickering. I felt something move and when I looked down, her finger was grazing against my palm.

"Yena...Yena!" I shouted, waking the duck up while she saw what was happening. But suddenly the machines went haywire as I saw her trying to gasp for air while doctors came running into the ward. "Move."

—

Third Person's POV

Minju stood there while the nurses brought her aside. Tears unknowingly fell down while the brunette saw how they were trying to resuscitate Yujin. She stayed still, not being able to take how her best friend is constantly trying to fight for her life. She tried to thrash her way through the nurses, shouting out painful cries but Yena held her back and covered her eyes, trying to calm her down as much as she can.

"No..." She wailed uncontrollably and found herself hyperventilating, making Yuri and Yena unknowingly cry when they heard how painful Minju's choked cries sounded as the doctors brought Yujin out of the ward. "I c-can't..."

"Shh..." Yena said as she slowly caressed her head and hugged her tightly, feeling how she was trembling tremendously. Minju continued sobbing on Yena's shoulder, just replaying the scenes in her head which made her break down even harder. "S-she's all...I have..." She uttered between cries which made the two friend's hearts broke just after what they read on that piece of paper. Now that Chaewon is out of the picture...Yujin is the only one left who'll be right by her side but that's not how things are looking right now. Everything could be felt, no, heard from how painful Minju's voice sounded. The two friends felt their hearts clutching with how Minju's agonising wail resonated through the empty room.

After quite a bit of time, Yuri continued caressing Minju's back, comforting her while the brunette's cries seemingly slowed down as Yena released her a little bit. Her eyes were really puffy...till the point it was red and swollen, face shouting grief and frustration. She's trying her best to stop bawling her eyes out but her tears are falling endlessly. She's broken...betrayed...in pain...lost...that's all she's feeling while thinking about what happened just from today itself.

The pain coming from what her boyfriend did to her...the person she once loved the most, from how she was left in the dark, not being able to know what was going on with her best friend just to find all this happening. The mortifying pain of going to lose someone who means the world to you that you have yet to realize. Someone's seemingly last words that are all written on a blank piece of paper dedicated to you when there are many other people she could write it to.

Minju doesn't know what to feel right now. Should she feel happy that her best friend likes her? Does she herself like her? Or should she feel sad that she's only knowing this when Yujin is desperately trying to stay alive?

Her mind is fighting against herself for not being there when Yujin is still well. When she could've just asked Yujin properly and not just blatantly assume things. She's blaming herself for not being more observant enough of her best friend, not knowing how she feels, not letting her speak with herself always talking and Yujin listening. The guilt she's feeling is slowly eating her up.

She has come to realize just how much Yujin means to her and that she shouldn't be mad at anything. Yujin doesn't need to feel sorry for liking her, and no, Minju won't hate her for that because that's just who she is. She's only noticing this now as she reminisced the times they spent together... realizing how Yujin looks at her from a different perspective...how she's always caring for her and protecting her from everything. All this realisation when Yujin is slowly drifting away.

Once Minju stopped crying completely, not knowing how long she has been, she looked at Yena and Yuri. "Why am I like this?" The two looked at her with confusion on their faces. "Why do I only realize it now?" she asked with a blank expression while Yena sighed.

"I'm sorry...for not telling you earlier." Minju shifted her gaze to the duck. Yena felt guilty that if only she told her earlier, she would've at least still see Yujin conscious. "She told me not to tell you...she was worried that you might become..." Yena looked at her whole. "Like this." But Yena doesn't blame anyone but herself.

—

Minju's POV

"Will that even change anything?" I said while the two of them looked down. Why did she think not telling me would be better than me finding out everything this way? What's wrong with you Yujin-ah...why are you being so stupid? Worrying over me when you're the one you should be worried about. "There's no point apologising, Yena..." I muttered while hearing a deep sigh coming from her.

I stood up and went out of the ward towards where the operating theatre is. The two followed behind as I sat down on one of the seats right outside the entrance of the operating theatre. I looked up and gazed at the ceiling, brushing my hair upwards and away from my face, letting my thoughts take over me, sighing nonstop as I comprehend the whole situation.

There's no point in continuously blaming myself anymore. At this point, all I can do is hope that she's fine, that's all I need to do. As I think about what happened within these few weeks...or maybe throughout our whole lives...everything was clearly laid out for me to see.

How she's always making sure I'm fine...looking after me whenever I get sick...bringing me food when I'm lazy to go to the cafeteria...taking blames for me...I don't think I could've lived without her.

The way she looked at me when she pushed me into the classroom...she probably saw something she didn't want me to see. Come to think of it, was that why she was blushing? Because of what I did?

Is that why she looked like she hated Chaewon? She knew? I just don't know since when but...that's the reason why she kept it from me?

So you're telling me it was me the whole fucking time? God Yujin, you better get your ass back here, deny your entrance to heaven and tell me everything.

After a few hours, nighttime came, maybe 2am? I told my mom I would be staying in the hospital. I told her about the whole thing and she said she would be coming tomorrow. The sliding doors open and the surgeons came out, pulling off their rubber gloves stained with blood. I quickly stood up and walked to them with Yena and Yuri, along with her parents.

This...doesn't look great.

"How is she? Is she okay?" I heard her mother asking with Yujin's dad holding onto her shoulders while I stared intently at the doctor who had an uneasy look on his face. He let out a big hefty sigh and took off his mask, putting on a face of condolence.

"We did everything we could."