In My Life I Love You More

Chapter Thirty Six

  Unedited

June 26th, 1969

True to his word, John was a devoted husband during his time in California, helping Josephina to cook, playing and caring for Grayson while spending long desired time with his new wife.

It also brought forth some thoughts that had been playing heavily in John's mind.

  Watching his wife dip their son's toes in the ocean waves and giggling at the child's delighted laughter, he was once again reminded of the upcoming choice that he'd not spoken to a soul about.

What would be their life in the next couple of years? 

  He knew things with the band were more than tense, they were barely hanging on by a thread. Between Paul's attempt to manage them and boss him around (it was still John's band Goddamn it), George's sourness at not having any of his songs on the upcoming album, and Yoko's nagging in his ear about promoting "Give Peace A Chance," and Cynthia's desire for him to have Julian stay with him and Josephina in London, he was ready to walk into the ocean and continue on until he submerged himself forever.

He just needed a break from it all.

"Wales? Scotland? What business do you have going there?" Gabriella scrunched up her nose as she helped Josephina put out plates on the back patio for a late lunch.

   John was inside with Emilia, and Beau was cleaning up for lunch. "A vacation," Josephina explained simply and her older sister blinked at her with bewilderment, "what's with the face?"

  "A vacation from what? Since you've been home, you haven't manned the shop once, you just stay cooped up in that mansion of yours until the need to bless your parents with your presence suits your royal highness." Gabriella spat, Josephina in response slammed the fork and knife down, hard enough to startle her sister.

   "What's eating you? You've been a total bitch ever since I came home!" Josephina snapped and Gabriella glanced worriedly towards the back door.

  "Would you lower your voice, Mom's inside!" She hissed, continuing to set the table, "and I could say the same thing about you."

  "I've only been reacting to you, and I know what's eating you, jealously, plain old fashioned jealously." Josephina pointed out, gaining satisfaction as her sister paused.

  "Maybe I am jealous, hmm? Not only did you leave not once, but twice! I have been the one to stay here, taking care of Mom and Dad. You've always gotten everything you want Josie."

  "I do not." Josephina shook with head but Gabriella nodded, smiling bitterly.

  "You do. You wanted fame and you got it through your husband. You wanted to be able to travel and still have a place in Half Moon to call homes and you do. You danced in an exotic club and you get to have everything you want!"

  "You can have that too Gabriella, why are you acting like you're an old maid past her prime?" Josephina crosses her arms, fed up with her sister's attitude.

  "Sam is in Vietnam. There's a chance he won't come back. Did you know he proposed to me before he left?" Gabriella reached into her shirt, pulling out a small engagement ring hanging on a chain.

  "H-he proposed...." Josephina covered her mouth, eyes wide at the sight and her sister, sniffing, nodded.

  "Oh yeah, he learned enough Spanish so that he could do it in two languages." She laughed sadly, wiping her tears.

  "Gabby why didn't you tell me..." Josephina walked over to her sister who shrugged.

  "You had just delivered Grayson and there was something more important for you to focus on." Josephina wrapped her arms around her sister, who broke down in her arms.

  "I'm sorry Gabby. I'm so sorry sissy." Josephina rubbed her sister's back soothingly.

"Now Colt's gone. I can't afford to lose you too Josie." She admitted, looking up when she felt her sister tilt her chin up.

"You're not losing me Gabby. You could never lose me. Your my sister and I love you, we'll always be sisters." Josephina states firmly and Gabriella sniffed, smiling.

"I love you too Josie."

Unknown to the two sisters, their mother was leaning against the doorframe on the other side, processing all that had been said.

   Her daughter had been a exotic dancer...........

      June 29th, 1969

       Scotland

  "You okay back there Julian?" Josephina looked back at six year old gazing out the window. The boy turned his brown eyes, so much like John's towards his stepmother, smiling shyly with a nod and Josephina returned it, facing the front again.

"Scotland's so beautiful." She gushed, watching the endless green roll by. In the driver's seat, John beamed, happy to share a place that held such dear memories from his childhood with the three most important people in his life.

   "We should be in Durness, soon. Get the kids settled before exploring the village." John glanced at Josephina who held a small tourist booklet, glancing between it and the scenery around them.

   "I can't wait to cuddle with you under a thick blanket." She leaned on John's side, smiling contently, things were really looking up.

Emilia was overwhelmed. One daughter was 4,964 miles away in another country in a hospital recovering from a car accident and the other's fiancée's family had just informed her that he had died in battle and that daughter had locked herself in her bedroom, her heart wrecking sobs cutting through every wall of the once happy home.

To top it all off, Beau was away, off fishing for Dungeness Crabs for crabbing season, leaving her alone to cope and deal with two of her grown children that needed her attention.

If a miracle could be given at that moment,

She'd take it without second thought.