For The Reason That

Chapter Fifteen

Before Seokjin could comprehend what's happening, Jungkook grabs his outreached hand, pulling him in. Seokjin's eyes widen with tears sitting on his lashes as Jungkook connects their lips.

He's frozen in place as Jungkook's lips brush against his, eyes closed and oblivious to the panic in his eyes. The kiss is sudden and hard at first but it melts into longing.

The snow has stilled around them as if to gawk at their action. They are out in the open with the whole world to witness.

Tears well in Seokjin's eyes again. With his free hand, he pushes at Jungkook's chest. He successfully gets Jungkook to stop kissing him, eyes opening. Seokjin's heart's beating faster than ever with a thousand different reasons as to why.

Jungkook's eyes widen and regret paint his features as he takes in the sight of Seokjin. Seokjin feels a tear slip from his eye as he pulls his hand out of Jungkook's hold, the hairpin now in his hand.

He stumbles back and away from Jungkook. "Jin, I-" Seokjin shakes his head, touching his lips that are still warm from Jungkook. Jungkook's forehead is creased, and his eyes are in a whirlwind of emotions. "I," Jungkook's voice comes out shaky. A moment of silence beat between them.

Jungkook breaks the silence with a whisper, "I hate you, Seokjin". His eyes meet Seokjin's tear-filled ones, "Because when you're with me..."

"I'm the happiest man in the world. When you look at me, you look at me like I'm important. When you laugh, it makes me want to do everything in my power to hear it again. When you smile at me, I want something I cannot have." Jungkook's eyes are watery as he holds Seokjin's gaze. "I want us."

Seokjin blinks and another tear escapes. "W-we can't." He fists his hands into balls. All those nights he stayed up smiling because of Jungkook, comes to him. "We can't..." he repeats, this time more to himself. The times his eyes lingered on Jungkook. The times he felt himself caring for him more than he should. They all swirl inside Seokjin.

The feelings and thoughts he kept pushed to the back of his mind springs out. The feelings and thoughts that agree with what Jungkook said.

"Why not?" Jungkook's fingers graze his hand. "You feel the same way, don't you?" He frantically searches Seokjin's eyes for an answer as Seokjin struggles to form words.

"We can't." Their hands find their way to each other. "I'm married to your brother," Seokjin's voice cracks and he could see the hope in Jungkook's eyes flicker, could feel the heartache. "I'm your brother-in-law."

"Don't you think I know that," Jungkook tries to raise his voice but it still comes out weak and unstable like their future together. "I know every time I see you in this palace." He pulls Seokjin closer by the hands. "I know every time I start to hope," Jungkook rests his forehead against Seokjin's. "That you and I can be together."

Seokjin squeezes his eyes shut, not able to meet Jungkook's. "Despite all odds, I can't help but continue to fall in-"

"Don't!" Seokjin's eyes fly open as he presses a hand to Jungkook's lips. He knows what Jungkook's going to say and he can't let his ears hear it. He can't let himself think they can be together. Seokjin rests his forehead back on Jungkook's, still keeping his hand on his lips. "Don't say that. Once you say it..."

Jungkook places his hand over Seokjin's, removing it. "Once I say it," Jungkook repeats, wanting Seokjin to finish.

Seokjin looks down at the sparkling white snow, something he would admire if it weren't for their situation. His voice is flat as he admits, "I would forget who I am."

'Would forget that you and I can't be together,' Seokjin's thoughts continue.

Jungkook turns his face back up, hand on Seokjin's chin. "Then let us forget. Let us forget that you're Prince Seokjin and I, Prince Jungkook. Let us just be Seokjin and Jungkook," Jungkook pleads, looking into Seokjin's eyes.