Sitio Series 3: Scheming List

Chapter 45

Hot Bath

"How?" Nangangatal ang aking mga kamay... "H-How did you..."

My heart drop into the coldest pole.

Genevorld stared into the depts on my soul, there's something the way he looked at me. Like there's a meaning on it.. "I-I...I j..just know.."

I laughed like a mad man at his answer. He's clearly lying! He knews something deeper than my past. I woobled all my lower strength vanished. "So what? Ano ngayon kung alam mong nakulong ako? Past is past." I reminded myself to breathe. "Your assumption are useless. Please kung ayaw mong lalo tayong magkasira tigilan mo na kung ano mang balak mo. If you're here to feast on my past then sorry to disappoint you because it won't happen. If you're here to make a way for your brother just please stop. Dahil wala akong balak magpatawad. " Genevorld looked defeated. Once again, he stared at me before walking away. "Ha.. Ha.. Hahahaha!" I laughed like a crazy, it was loud enough for someone to hear and think it is sort of witch. My tears synchronized with those faint laughter. Niyakap ko ang mga binti ko't ibinaon ang mukha roon. "I..If y-you just apologize s..sooner I might f.. forgive y-you and f..f-forget a-all t..the t-things you've a..all d..done b..but.. B-But..." Hindi ko na naituloy ang sasabihin ng mapalakas ang hikbi.

This is way I hated hearing what happened in the past, I hated the fact that I wasn't the one who was suffering, I hated it because I might forgive them and set aside this feelings of mine.. I hate it... W-Why should I accept and forgive? W..Why should I listen to their sides? W..Why?

I lay shivering and gasping for air as I tried to calmed myself. It was like a flood slowly filling my head the times I was confined, the medication, the therapy went into waste as I cried harder. All of those misery was always there no matter how hard I ran it kept on chasing me..

Slowly and painfully as I laid on the grassy ground I shut my eyes.. To rest while hoping I won't wake up..

__________

“What happened?”

“What was the date, time and duration of the incident or behavior?”

“How many times did this happen?”

“Where did it happen?”

“How did it happen?”

“Did anyone else see it happen?”

“Was there physical contact?”

Those questions kept ringing on my head even though I'm in a deep sleep or in the influence of drugs. It haunted me everytime, every breathing I do, every sight on the mirror.. Why? Ako ang biktima pero ako ang nagdurusa para sa kanila?

“Did you enjoyed it?”

I felt a hot liquid dripping on my face, I frowned on my sleep. “I..I’m s...s-sorry...” It was a faint voice I didn't understand what it means..

Who? Is it Viech? Clasper? Or Genevorld again?

Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras ang itinagal ko sa paghiga sa damuhan pilitin ko mang imulat ang aking mga mata’y wala akong lakas.. I was mentally exhausted. Again, I felt a warm trembling hand caressing my face... It was like that hand was afraid to touch me.. Afraid that I might break. A frantic pounding, a racing beat... Changed heart..

It felt so peaceful but at the back of my mind it has overshadowed violence.

Hapon na nang magising ako. Wala na sa lugar kung saan ako humiga bagkos ay nasa loob na ng rest house nila Shamaine. Deiry told me that I was carried back while sleeping and because I looked so exhausted they insisted to let me rest until we left that place.