The Flame Trilogy (Books I, II & III)

2.13

Arashi

"You really need to stop distracting me during the day" Dimitri muses, leaning against the doorframe of the room. It's my room here in ShadowFang, and if I could concentrate long enough I'd picture somewhere different for us to be; something about him seeing this place made me antsy. Something between the shame of this being where I come from, the poor conditions of the room and, the fact that in real life Zakhar is passed out beside me on my bed.

Zakhar and I had been scheming some more; for appearances sake we agreed that it would be better that we stay in the same room. Everyone did after all think we were fucking regularly, it just made sense.

I don't remember how long we talked for, or even what about. In fact, I barely noticed myself falling asleep, it was only until Dimitri showed up that I realised I had to be sleeping.

"I could say the same to you." I hum, taking in his gloriously shirtless form.

I sit up from where I'm still covered in my bed; from the corner of my eyes I glance beside me to make sure Zakhar truly isn't there hoping that Dimitri wouldn't notice. It isn't as if we're actually doing anything, so I know it doesn't really matter, but I have a feeling Dimitri wouldn't see things the same way as me.

Is there a rule that says that mates are not allowed to sleep with other people? I didn't exactly have an opportunity to ask whilst I was actually with Dimitri, being somewhat distracted with the threat of genocide and general impending doom.

"Is this your room in Shadow Fang?" He asks, taking a few steps around the grey, cold, sparse room.

"Yes," I nod. "Though this is more private than the other barracks, Beta's get special privileges."

His face is enough to show his upset, though I'm not entirely sure why; though dreadfully depressing the room has severed all my previous purposes, and considering my stance on the future, I either wouldn't need it or live long enough to feel any kind of emotion at the prospect of never seeing it again.

"I can't believe that you don't think anything is fucking wrong with this." Dimitri growls.

I suppose if I were to mentally compare the room I used in Dimitri's pack, to this one now, I would notice the alarming differences. However, being in Shadow Fang meant ignoring the materialistic, besides all I had ever used this room for was sleeping, or a good fuck here and there; again it served its purpose.

"It doesn't matter, not in the grand scheme of things." I placate him, and luckily for this strange dreamscape world it comes out with a feeling that I'd probably fail to convey had we been awake in real life.

"Maybe not, but it doesn't help me to stop worrying about you all the time. I saw what those memories did to you, I saw what that man made you into Arashi." His voice is soft, though there is an edge to it just below the surface. He takes a step forward, though stops himself; he's trying to hold himself back though from what, or why I don't understand.

"You're worried I'll turn into a monster again?" I want to taunt him but it comes out more like a fearful whimper; fear for myself turning back into what I was, and fear that Dimitri thinks I might. It still haunts me to think about what he might do if he ever sees me for what I am.

His head snaps up, his eyes locking with my vulnerable purple ones, gaze unwavering. His brows furrow as he watches me, his lips pinching in a straight line. Even though we technically can't hide from each other here, it doesn't mean we can read minds- and Dimitri is someone that, even when he isn't masking his emotions, I find hard to read.

"No." He finally says, taking another step towards me, no longer holding himself back. He keeps walking, stopping only when he reaches where I'm sitting on my bed. He looks down at me from his standing position above me, but surprises me when he sits on the floor at my feet; this is not the man that shoved my face into mud, or collared me those months ago.