Mutinous

Chapter 2

'Don't want you to regret anything. Don't want you to regret anything.' Jen's words kept repeating themselves in my mind. I wasn't going to regret anything, right? I knew people were saying you only regret the things you didn't do, but I was fine as I was. At least, I thought I was.

The weekend came faster than expected with the bad weather and Jen's annoying words constantly haunting my mind.

Maggie and I had been on good terms without our parents around, and I knew very well that was exactly the reason. There was no special treatment on Maggie's behalf and there was no one around that either of us could play the other up against. It felt nice I had to admit, yet, I hated that they seemed to care more about work than they did us.

I was sitting in the kitchen in silence with Maggie when my thoughts wandered back to boys while I thought of Jen's words. It wasn't Harry in particular, though he had a way of finding my thoughts as well, but more boys in general. It was like he had triggered all these things in my mind I had tried my hardest to push to the back, but which had finally found the way to the surface.

A waving hand in front of my eyes, as I stared out the window, took me by surprise, and I diverted my attention to the person who the hand belonged.

"You were daydreaming," Maggie's statement was true but nothing I didn't know already. I'd always been a daydreamer. I would dream of the future. I would wonder what it held for all of us, and I would picture myself with a boyfriend I knew I couldn't have. I understood my parents reasoning, though. A boyfriend would take my mind off of my education, and all my life they had made sure I knew sex was meant for marriage, however, just like a typical teenager I pictured him holding my hand on the way to class and stealing kisses when nobody was watching.

"I know," I smiled simply.

"You going to enlighten me?" She was curious, she always was.

I shook my head, in an attempt of telling her it wasn't important. but since I was lacking on the friend part, she had been the closest person I had while growing up. She most likely knew me better than anyone else, even if we had our fights.

"Tell me."

"Ever wondered what it'd be like to kiss someone? What life would be like if mum and dad hadn't set all these rules for us. I mean I understand why, but still. I just can't help but wonder," I said, but she stayed silent and at first I didn't know why, but then I knew. And in some way it hurt.

"You didn't," I said shaking my head obviously judging her, which I knew wasn't fair. But she was my little sister. She was 3 years younger than me, she wasn't supposed to experience things before I did. I could not believe she kissed someone.

"Please don't tell mum and dad," she looked panicked.

"Tell them what? That you're a normal teenager wanting to experience life? No. I won't tell them that," the sigh of relief coming from her by my words made me smile, even though I still wished she hadn't done it. I wasn't surprised though. She'd always been more outgoing than me.

"Who was it with?"

A blush appeared on her cheeks, "A boy in my gym class."

"What did it feel like?"

"Well, I was nervous at first, but it was nice. It made butterflies erupt from my stomach. And my cheeks turned warm," she blushed again just talking about it, and I wanted to say something, but it felt as if my throat was blocked for air, and I was empty for words. I knew I was being jealous. I wanted to experience that too. I wanted to know what it was being a normal teenager even though that would most likely never happen.