another pretty december | b.e

nine

what's your current fave tv show?  my fav show atm is greys anatomy 

I decide to leave my hair natural for a couple of days but I book an appointment to a hair salon for next week when I have a full day off.

once sound check is over I got into my dressing room to get ready and have a cup of tea in the green room, sitting on harry's lap.

I open up my notebook and flick through until I find the lyrics I was working on earlier, showing them to harry to see what he thinks. 

ive been working on a lot of music for my upcoming album and he's always the first person I show my lyrics too.

"I like this, what was the inspiration?"

I skim through the lyrics and finish off my tea, thinking. 

before I have the chance to reply, the green room door swings open and finneas walks in, Patrick and billie following closely behind him.

great.

just what I needed.

I close my book and slip it back into my bag, not wanting anyone to see it or ask about it.

I hate making music in-front of my friends or people, I'd rather then hear it when it's finished.

because this shit takes a long ass time to make sound good.

instead, I lay my head on harry's shoulder and watch them going to the table to grab some food, talking amongst themselves.

"you guys want anything?" finneas asks me glancing over his shoulder and I shake my head, closing my eyes. 

"throw me a bag of Doritos" harry says, shuffling back a little to get more comfortable. 

"are you okay?" harry murmurs kissing the top of my head and I nod, relaxing into his touch.

harry has gotten used to me laying on him and napping on him, even when his ex didn't like it.

honestly, I think it's weird if you let your partner hang out with one gender, but not another.

she knew I was gay, she knew I saw harry as more of a brother than I ever would a boyfriend but she still made it a big deal.

im so fucking glad she's an ex. 

I do hope that his future partner respects our friendship and understands if I wanna cuddle him, it doesn't mean I wanna fucking suck his dick.

the only dick im tryna be sucking is a silicone one.

attached to a fucking woman.

and I hope my future girlfriend understands too. 

I don't really date because they don't understand my life so I just stick to having fuck buddies and side hoes. 

although since my career has started sky rocketing, it's so much harder to find someone. 

and at the moment, im not interested.

I can look after myself.

"are you seriously gone fall asleep?" harry asks and I smile against his neck, nodding. 

no matter where I am or what im doing, I can always nap.

and I fucking love sleeping.

"we have some time before the show" I murmur, my body feeling heavy. "just wake me up later so I can touch up my makeup"

"I will baby, I hope you dream of me" I smirk and slide my hand up his torso, squeezing his pec like it was a boob.

"I always dream of you daddy"

"fuck off" he laughs, pushing my hand away, smiling when his chest vibrates against me. 

I hear billie talking with her brother about some dude texting her and I roll my eyes under my closed lids.

before I came onto this tour I was expecting maybe to be friends with her, especially because she seems so lovely and she's hot as fuck.

now, I can't wait until she's out of the room. 

I can feel her judging me. 

I always see her staring at me, a dirty look on her face every time we make eye contact.

I hate that she hates me. 

because if she carries on, there's no way im staying on this tour.

I'd rather lose fans, money and probably a manager but at the end of the day, my mental health comes first.

I need to call my mum. 

harry's fingers rub against the base of my hairline at my neck, just where I like it.

I remember one of the first times I napped on him, he tried to run his fingers through my hair and got them caught in my curls.

we laughed it off and ever since, he runs his fingers along the back of my neck or strokes my cheek, sending me to sleep. 

he's my best friend and I love him so much.

this is kinda short but hey, I promise we've got some good shit coming. 

how are you liking it so far?be honest pls I can take it 

thank you for being patient and for commenting funny shit on my posts <3