another pretty december | b.e

fifteen

when I step onto the tour bus, im already in my pyjamas and bonnet, ready to get some sleep without having to wake up at six in the morning again.

I actually can't believe how much I love sleeping on the bus.

I mean yeah, my bunk is tiny but I make it work with my blanket, fairy lights and lamby.

when I slide open the curtain to my bunk, I let out a little gasp when I see a brand new copy on the book I'd dropped in the bath last night.

I pick it up and ready the little post-it note stuck on the front.

sorry for making you drop your book in the bath

billie bought this for me?

this bitch and her mixed signals I swear to god.

I lock my bag back to the bottom of my bed and slide in, turning my fairy lights on and making myself comfortable, opening up where I left off.

before I start reading I take my phone out of my bag and pull up my text messages with billie.

billie

thank you for the book ❤️

no problem
come out to the front of the bus
we're about to play uno
join us

okay gimme a sec

I swear to god im about to get whiplash from all of these mixed signals.

what is going on?

regardless I find a receipt in the bottom of my bag, shove it into my book and turn my fairy lights off, climbing out of bed and putting my sliders back on, walking through to the front of the bus.

"you joining in?" harry asks, a mouth full of food.

I look in-front of him and see a plate of carrot sticks and a pot of hummus.

I fucking love hummus.

"of course imma beat you. where did you get this?" I pick up a carrot stick, scooping up some hummus and shoving it into my mouth.

damn this shit is fucking good.

"my mom made it" billie comments, shuffling the cards.

"oh my god this shit is so good"

"i know! my mom is literally the best cook in the world"

i miss my mum.

i can't wait till we have a two week break and i can go home and see her.

three weeks away baby.

harry must notice the look on my face because he grabs onto my hand under the table, squeezing it.

i smile and shake the sad thoughts away, knowing if i think about my family back home, i'll probably cry.

im so close with my parents, similar to how billie is with her parents, and this is the longest ive been without seeing them.

after a round of uno, which finneas won, I excuse myself and go back into my bunk, to call my mom.

billie was acting fine around me, nothing like she ever was before.

I don't really understand what's going on with her but im just going along with it right now.

maybe we'll have the opportunity to talk properly.

maybe we won't.

im over it.

"hi my beautiful mummy" I smile when her beautiful face lights up my phone screen.