|Infatuation| *Loki BWWM*

{17}

Very brief mentions of suicidal thoughts, abuse, and self harm ⚠️

~Alaia~

"Bye Tony" I said before giving him a big hug. He hugged me back, squeezing tightly.

"I'll miss you" He admitted before letting me go. I don't know why he was being all sappy, I'll be coming back to see them in February.

"I'll miss you too. Call me if you need something"

He nodded and we embraced one last time before I turned to walk over to Loki. Though, I stopped in my tracks when I seen him.

He was conversing with his brother- they were about to leave as well. His black hair was tied into a bun- a style I begged him to try. He had on a green, long sleeved shirt matched with black pants.

It wouldn't have been Loki if he didn't have at least one piece of gold jewelry on him (which happened to be a single gold ring).

He looked so relaxed. A wide grin was spread across his face. In the few weeks that I've known him, I've never seen him so happy.

I couldn't help but wonder if his beaming smile had any connection to the conversation we had last night.

I had agreed to work on our relationship, and to embrace the newfound family I had within the avengers. They were so warm, so nice.

They were everything I've ever wanted in a family.

Not the constant belittling, the competition, or the humiliation I got with my parents.

Loki was everything I wanted in a man, everything I deserved.

I never should have gotten the random beatings and constant acts of disparage from Ross.

Those relationships lead me to years of horrific nightmares, thoughts of offing myself- as I felt I was a mistake, and cutting myself in hopes that the pain from the knife would replace the ache in my heart.

Nothing changed until I met Loki, and it only got better when I met the others.

But there's a voice in the back of my head saying he'll hurt me.

A voice saying Loki will use and abuse me- just as the people in my past did.

That voice only gets louder as Loki finally looks at me. I couldn't help but stare into his eyes, wishing and hoping the voice in the back of my head was wrong.

He excused himself from Thor and walked over to me. He grabs my hand and kisses it gently

"You okay?" He asks in a sweet tone of voice

I nod, "I'm fine. You?"

"I'm wonderful" he replies

We say our last goodbyes to everyone before I attempt to create my first portal to Asgard. It took a few tries but I eventually got it.

Thor shot me a smile right before grabbing his things and walking through the portal. My chest began to hurt as I realized this meant Loki was about to leave as well.

I watched him pick up his things and move towards the portal. But, there was obvious hesitation in his steps. He kept glancing back at me, almost as if he expected me to stop him.

I only smiled and blew him a small kiss. That didn't seem to satisfy him, as he set his stuff down and walked over to me.

"Come with me?" He asked quietly. My face heated and I noticed everyone giving me teasing smiles before leaving the room.

Once we were alone, I shook my head

"Loki I can't" I say

"Why? We're supposed to be working on us"

"I'll only get in the way" I sigh

"Do you not want to be with me?"

"I do" I respond genuinely, taking his hand and holding it.

"Then come with me. Only for a little while. I'll show you around. You can meet the people, and try new foods- and then we can leave and go to Alaska if you want. Just don't leave me"

My mouth stayed slightly agape as I stared at him. He was being serious, and I was stunned.

I wanted to work on us, I really did. But I was still so scared.

I swore I was gonna let him in, and here I am letting my past dictate my future.

"Loki? Are you coming?" We hear Thor ask. Loki gave me the saddest look before giving me a kiss.

"I'll call you" Was all he said before attempting to walk off

But I kept a grip on his hand, making him look at me. I trusted him. I wanted to be with him.

"I'll go with you" I said quietly

"Huh?" He asked, "I'm sorry sweetheart, I couldn't hear you"

"I said I'll go with you" Slightly louder this time

"One more time?" He asked. I rolled my eyes and grabbed his face, pulling it down and kissing him passionately.

He kissed back, giving a satisfied hum.

Once we pulled away, he looked deep in my eyes and said, "I heard you the first time, I just wanted to hear you say it again"

I playfully hit him as he pulled me in for another kiss.

"Wait" I say suddenly, pulling away from him, "Won't I need to grab some more clothes?"

"No. We have washing machines in Asgard"

I rolled my eyes and grabbed my bags

I called for Peanut and she ran right passed us and into the portal. Loki and I shared a quick laugh before walking into the portal together.

____________________

Sorry for mistakes 💚

So this is the final chapter ❤️❤️ My original plan was to have this book be longer but I started to feel as if the book wasn't good.

I was gonna abandon it completely but I know a good amount of people really likes the book so I finished it ❤️

Im sorry if the book was too short BUT I do have a story planned that features both the Joker AND Loki.

Would y'all want that book?