A Close Second

Forty Fifth

"Is there something wrong?"

I looked at Keith Andrew who just went by my side as I stood by their veranda.

Aya and the others went back to eating breakfast dahil kababa lang ni Kuya Andrei and Ate Pam had taken over the kitchen again. Naka upo silang lahat sa may sala kung saan Nakaopen ang TV, watching what seemed to be an NBA league game while munching on some greasy breakfast that Ate Pam had cooked up for their hangovers.

I was just on the phone with Kuya Anton a while ago, who told me that he had to run a quick errand for Yaya sa bahay and he was going to be late for another 15 minutes.

My mind was still reeling over the whole Plan B ordeal ni Ate Pam.

"What's on your mind?" Tanong nito sa akin, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and placing a kiss on my head. "Hindi ka masyadong kumain, may gusto ka bang kainin? I can whip up an oatmeal for you."
Umiling lang ako. "I'm just not hungry."
"Was it Ate Cathy?"

I looked at him, a bit surprised. Hinawakan niya ang isang pisngi ko, locking eyes with mine.

"You have to stop letting her get to you." He says.
I bit my lip. "Sometimes, naiingit ako sa inyo ni Kuya Andrei." I tell him honestly. "But I can't imagine Ate Cathy having a caring bone in her body."
"You don't actually believe that?"
"I don't." I smiled. "But we're yet to see proof."

Natawa siya ng mahina, shaking his head and then placing a kiss on my forehead.

"You just have to talk to her about it."
"There's no talking with her." I tell him. "There's just listening and she does all the talking."
"Pero kung hindi ka magsasalita, hindi niya malalaman yung nasa utak mo." He says. "You communicate with her."
"Can I really do that?" Tanong ko.
Another kiss on my forehead. "Of course."

I sigh, closing my eyes and let him wrap his arms around me. His scent surrounds me, calming me down a little and easing the anxiety that's settling within.

I can't believe the power he holds against me.

"Okay, now I know that's not the thing that's on your mind." He whispers lowly. "What's bothering you, babe?"

I shook my head once more and he just sighs, pulling me closer and then placing a kiss on the side of my head. Ipinulupot ko nalang ang mga kamay sa bewang niya, burying my face in his chest. Natawa siya ng mahina saka ako niyakap pa.

"What's this? Clingy Beatrice?" He whispers, placing a kiss on my head again habang nakatungo lang ako sa dibdib niya. "Baby."
"Hmm?"
"You're still thinking about last night huh?"

A blush creeps on my face, buti nalang hindi niya nakikita.

"Did you realize we had unprotected sex?" Mahinang tanong ko sa kanya.

He stiffens a bit, but I feel him press his face into my hair and his hug tightens around me, enclosing me more into him.

"It's my fault." Sabi nito. "I did pull out, and I did my best to clean you up. I'm so sorry, baby. Dapat di ako nagpadala."

Hindi ako nakapagsalita, I just shook my head into his chest. Truth was, I was too scared to voice out that my mind was telling me all the possible consequences.

A baby. A baby was a consequence of unprotected sex. I had read enough books and seen enough movies where these things happened. I never thought I'd be facing them one day. We're young. 12th grade was hell, yes but we still had college. I haven't even decided where I'll go to.

I know it was kind of bad to overthink, but it's what I do best.

"Ms. Beatrice, dumating na po ang driver ninyo."