Nothing like him

Part 34

    His words echoed in my brain. He didn't give me much of an explanation. He said that I need to focus on my book, work and family shit and that he can't be my main priority anymore. He said the new treatment will cause him to be moody and he'll end up pushing me away anyways. I held in my sobs as I grabbed my purse and started making my way out of the room. Tears fell silently down my cheeks. Dean doesn't want me anymore.
"Mariana wait" Chantel's voice echoed from half way down the hall as she jogged towards me, arms open and ready for me to bury myself in. She wrapped her arms around me and held me close to her. She gave me that motherly hug I never knew I needed. Brushing her fingers through my hair and I cried into her. Rubbing my back with a curtain amount of force, like she was squeezing the pain out of me. It was exactly what I needed right now.
"I'm so sorry Mariana" she said softly. "Dean is just struggling really hard and I don't know why he just did that but he is not in the best emotional state. I'll try to talk to him about it and see where he is at. I promise I'll keep you posted on what is happening" she brushed her fingers through my hair and kissed the top of my head. She's a good mom to everyone.
I walked back to my apartment in the rain, which worked well for hiding my tears. The streets were very busy with gift buying for christmas. I had nowhere to go for christmas. I planned to spend Christmas with Dean and his family, but with recent circumstances, I think I better not. Once I got home I cracked open a fresh bottle of Chardonnay and grabbed a glass before taking a seat on the couch and burning myself in the blankets.
I grabbed my laptop and tried to work on my story. I scrolled up to see where I had left off and noticed that Dean added some stuff to it. I scrolled up to see that Dean had actually added a lot of parts to the story without me noticing. I read it over  and smiled at the things he wrote. He only ever wrote when it was with me so seeing this really warmed my heart. I decided to leave his part in the story with the thought of him seeing it published one day.
After writing for hours I decided to try and get some cleaning done and then find something to do on christmas. I started planning with basic questions. Who would want my company during christmas? Who spends Christmas alone? Did I want to be around people?  So many things to consider when trying to plan Christmas last minute by yourself. I'd already bought presents for Dean and his family and had them under their tree. I might just end up sitting at home with a glass of wine and ramen noodles while watching greys anatomy on my couch for christmas.
***
The next morning I got up bright and early even though I still had two more days off work. I needed to get more of my story done and go shopping for groceries since my fridge was empty. I walked outside of my apartment to see Frank sitting out on his bench reading an old journal that looked like it's been through a lot.
"Hey Frank," I said as I walked up to him. He put his finger in the air, telling me to wait while he finishes reading the sentence. So I did. Whatever he was reading had made him smile before looking up at me. His teeth showed and the wrinkles on his face increased as he smiled, it was contagious. Frank was an asshole sometimes but he's a nice man once you get to know him. You just have to work on it.
"Hello fellow young one" he said with a giggle.
"What makes you smile so big?" I said, I sat on the seat next to him.
"My wife's journal. I'm reading what she wrote after our first date in 1982" he smiled and closed the journal, treating it with a gentle touch. His smile faded slightly as he looked down at the book. Just then it occurred to me that Frank has always been alone for christmas, ever since his wife passed away. I didn't know if he had kids or not but if he did they sure never came to visit him. Holidays must be hard for him, all the families are together while he is alone.
"Hey Frank," I started. "How would you like to spend Christmas with me?" I said with a friendly smile. He looked at me with a slight smile. His eyes watered a bit, as if he was waiting for someone to ask him. He let out a short sigh.
"Goddamn it child. The holidays are icky. I usually just snort coke in my living room but if you insist" he said jokingly. I laughed.
"So December 25th, christmas dinner at your place. Be there" I said.
"You better not come empty handed kid. I can't cook even if my life depended on it" he said while getting up and shuffling back to his apartment like an old man would. Frank was very old. It scared me to think about it but what if this christmas was his last? The thought scared me so I tried to push it aside but it refused to leave. I had to make sure this Christmas was fun for him. It was my mission to make Frank's Christmas better than any other he's had- if he has ever had a real proper christmas.