Urgency of Heat (El Refugio #1)

Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Gone

I was shocked. I didn't expect that he would kiss me. Without me noticing, tears flowed out of my eyes as I look at him with disgust, distrust, at the same time happiness. I questioned myself. Is this what I always dreamt of?

I don't know why but I felt disgusted the moment are lips parted away. All of those wildly dreams of him every night came back at that moment. It felt surreal.

I never expected him to kiss me. Thus, my mind became blank for his reasons for what he did. Is it fun? Halata ba masyado ako?

I look at him.

There this smile plastered in his face. His hands still on my waist. I'm shivering as of now, my heart beating so fast.

I look at his eyes.

I was so happy that he kissed me. Pero agad iyong nawala ng makita ko ang kaniyang mukha. Nakangiti siya habang nakatingin sa akin. His eyes is different as of this moment. He looks so happy. Very different from the past. His dead eyes became alive.

His pheromones lingers still. Hindi ko alam kong ako nalang ba ang nakakaamoy niyon pero sobrang lakas parin niyon na sumasakal sa akin.

It felt so weird.

Naging mabilis ang pagtulo ng aking luha. Nang mapansin niya iyon ay agad niya akong binitiwan. He realized that I am crying now. That what his face is telling me.

He noticed that I'm crying. Idagdag mo pa ang panginginig ko. Dahil doon, tumalikod siya sa akin at umalis. Bumababa narin ako sa stage kahit na hindi ko masyadong igalaw ang aking mga paa.

Nag da-dalawang isip pa ako kung papasok ako sa trabaho. Esteban never came after he left. Hindi niya tinapos ang klase at umalis na lamang doon na walang sabi, kahit sa akin ay hindi siya nagpaalam. Hindi ko na siya nakita sa mga sumunod na araw.

Sa huli ay pumasok ako sa trabaho. Esteban was nowhere to be found. After our kiss and the next days, I've never seen him. Kahit sa balita ay hindi ko siya nakita. In his social media accounts, it was quite. As if he was gone.

Monday came fast. Esteban was absent the whole day. Hindi ako mapakali. Kahit na wala siya ay kinakabahan ako. Kung narito man siya ay nasisiguro kong kakabahan din ako.

The whole class ended. And Esteban were absent. Hindi ko alam kong bakit siya absent. Kahit sa El Refugio ay hindi ko rin siya makita.

The following days, he never came to our classes nor the El Refugio. He never visited any events nor posted in his social media accounts.

Then one day, our adviser announce that Esteban were no longer continuing his studies. He dropped out of school.

"I receive a call from Esteban Gallego. He said that he will no longer take this class and will dropped his studies. It was confirmed by the president of the university." Our adviser said.

Madami ang nagulat sa mga kaklase ko dahil doon, lalo na ako.

"As per his reason, it is confidential." Our advisor added.

I never seen him nor get any information about him the whole month. I was curious and troubled. Hindi ako mapakali dahil sa kaniyang biglang pagkawala.

Hindi kaya siya tumigil dahil sa naging halikan namin? Iwinaksi ko iyon sa aking isipan.

Baka marami lamang siyang ginagawa sa kaniyang trabaho kaya hindi na niya kayang mapagsabay ang pag-aaral. He already has his degree after all. He don't need to study again.

After a month, a major announcement from his company was announced. The collaboration between his company and another company to build an entertainment company was announced. It was a talk of town after the announcement.

When I open the internet, it was all over my screen. What really caught my announcement was Esteban's face that pop up out of nowhere.

He was standing in a forum, holding a ribbon in one of his hand while the other one is hand shaking the hand of a girl beside him. He wasn't smiling in the picture but the girl beside was smiling happily. He was so cold, just by looking at his face in the picture.

"Galleria Entertainment"

It was written in a big poster at their back. On the post, I've seen that the name of the entertainment came from "Gallego" and "Valeria", the surnames of the C.E.O of each company that collaborated for this company.

After a year, the company was successful in the nation. And I continued my studies. I was already in my second year when their first year annual aniversary happen.

I was watching in the tv when their ball of actors, actress, investors, producers, C.E.O and others for their company. I saw Esteban, looking happily with the people around him. The same girl from before is holding his hand. I felt the pain in my heart as I watch them, him happily socialize with the people around him.

I was jealous, mad, but what matters the most is the sadness that I felt today.

Walang araw na hindi ko siya iniisip. Walang araw na hindi ko siya napapanaginipan. I asked myself what I am doing. What happen to us before is just a mere dust to his life.

To him, it was nothing. But for me, it was the most joyful event that happened to my life. It was the best start of school. Kahit ilang araw lang iyon, hindi ko maipagkakaila na naging masaya ako.

The only regret I have with me is the fact that I didn't take the risk while he was still near me. Ngayong malayo na siya ay alam na alam ko nang wala na akong pag-asa.

My job at El Refugio continued. He never visited El Refugio again after the day we kissed. Hindi ko na siyang muling nakita dito. Alam kong naging madali ang trabaho ko dahil doon pero hindi ko maipagkakaila ang kakulangan sa aking sarili.

Para bang kulang ang araw ko. Hindi gaya noong nakikita ko pa siya palagi. Ngayon ko lang napagtanto kong gaano ako ka-excited noon para makita siya. Lahat nang kabang naramdaman ko noon ay parte lang pala ng pagkagusto ko sa kaniya.

We were already in 3rd year when I decided to forget about him and started to notice the people that courting me, especially Lucas.

After 3 months of courtship and thinking, I decided to become Lucas' boyfriend. He was an alpha, I thought that it will help me forgot about him.

Matagal kong pinag-iisipan ang desisyon kong iyon. And I slowly started to get used to our relationship.

"Good morning, Beauty." He said, smilingly beautiful at me.

It was already six months since we became a lover. I no longer ride my bike nor ride in Ivan's tricycle because Lucas always give me a ride. Papunta at pauwi sa school ay hinahatid ako ni Lucas. I never seen Ivan since then. Hindi ko na siya makita sa paligid mula nang mayroong sumusundo sa aking kotse. Pero alam kong nasa paligid lang siya, hindi lang kami nagkikita.

Of course, Lucas didn't know that I worked in El Refugio. Ang alam lang niya ay ay nagtratrabaho ako tuwing gabi. Ilang ulit niya akong tinatanong pero ilang ulit ko rin siyang hindi sinasagot.

I know I'm being secretive but he should never knew that I'm working inside El Refugio.

We are lovers. A lot of people inside the university know that. I know he love me, but for the six months, my heart never beat the way it beats for Esteban.

To be continued...