Glorybringer AU ☆the fault in our stars☆

[35] Pretend Game

☆Glory☆

"You are all the colors in one, at full brightness."

-Jennifer Niven, All the Bright Places

☆

There's a dark mist over our love, the whisper of doom. Maybe that's what makes it thrilling, the fact that this is all going to end tragically. That yes, this is going to end, that this moment will never come again. It's a love destined to destroy both of us. 

Tonight, you're not Deathbringer. Tonight, I'm not Glory. We're two different people. This is a pretend love game. It seems like an unspoken promise between the two of us.

I'm losing myself in this game, giving him everything. Deathbringer, on the other hand, is holding back slightly. His fingers are hesitant, afraid of touching me. So I take control, holding his hands against my face, making sure that he never lets go. It's my first kiss-- ever-- and I'm sure I'm doing it wrong. Convinced that he has done this many times with girls way better than me. But I go on anyway. I try to take him in, the things that were locked away from me for all those years. I take my hands from his and run them through his hair, against his neck, pressing him closer to me. 

I can feel him breathing against me, the small thumping of his heart against my hand. Everything about him makes me forget who we are, where I am. 

Deathbringer slowly becomes more and more open-- he wraps his hands around my waist, holding me closer. His lips brush over not just my lips but over my forehead, my nose, my eyes, my cheeks, my jaw. They slowly find their way back to me. For the first time, it occurs to me that maybe he might want me as much as I want him. That he has longed for me like I have longed for him, all this time. 

Unlike me, Deathbringer knows what he's doing. Our soft kiss gets deeper, and I give up trying to do anything and just follow him along. His face is tilting a little to the side, and I breathe heavily against him. All I can do is hope that this will never stop. There's no sound except the sound of my heart beating, clear and loud. 

He gently pulls back, and my stomach drops. But when his eyes flutter open-- his dark, dark eyes-- they are not accusing. They are just staring softly, apparently asking me a question.

Okay?

I give him a small smile and just close my eyes. 

Okay.

His lips find my lips. His fingers find my fingers. 

☆

"I started liking you when we went to middle school." 

I'm resting my face on Deathbringer's legs, watching Gone with the Wind together. But neither of us are looking at the TV-- it's just a small noise in the background. Scarlett is screaming about something, but we are just staring at each other.

"Why?"

I consider his question for a second. Wondering if I should tell him about the drown incident. I decide against it. "I mean, there wasn't a particular boom, I guess. Like, it wasn't due to this one big incident. You just kind of slowly drew me in. Ever since we met." As I say it, I realize that this is also true. Can a person really start to like a person after one little thing? Without either of us knowing, Deathbringer was drawing me in. He was just that sort of a person. Perhaps from the very first day we met. I suddenly feel embarrassed, so I turn and stare at the TV screen a little harder, refusing to look at his face. 

"I win, then. I liked you ever since we started elementary school."

I turn to look at him accusingly. "That's just a lie. Remember when you would come over to my house everyday and just talk about your girlsfriends for three hours?"