Aftermath

13

Matthew held Cal's hand as they walked to the bar, Cal tucked herself against his arm to combat the chill of the wind. Before they stepped in, he pulled her to the side and pushed her waves back from her face.

"You look good." he leaned in and whispered. She could feel his smile against her jaw before he placed a soft kiss on the skin.

"Thank you" she responded, pulling away so she could press a kiss to his lips. He kissed her back for a moment, but Calpurnia pulled away again, ending it. "We should go, they're all waiting." She gestured inside to where they were supposed to meet everyone. Matthew nodded and took her hand in his again. He walked them inside and immediately Calpurnia was taken aback by the number of people crammed into the bar.

His grip on her hand tightened, as they made their way through the people. She gave his hand a quick squeeze letting him know she was okay. Calpurnia heard Oliver before she saw him, and felt Matthew drop her hand as they approached the group. She looked to meet his eyes, but he was looking ahead at the group offering smiles and hellos.

Calpurnia slid her hands down her thighs, before wrapping them around herself. Cal nodded hello to everyone and when Oliver made eye contact with her he smiled and headed her way.

"Hey!" he said, pulling her into his side for a quick hug. "I'm glad you came!" Cal couldn't help but smile. Oliver was a very attentive person. He made sure everyone in the room felt welcome and special. From across the group, a girl smiled their way but Calpurnia didn't recognize her. "That's Holden," Oliver said, waving her over "she's my girlfriend."

He introduced Cal to Holden and then Cal slipped away to get a drink. She ordered a gin and tonic and stood at the bar for a moment sipping her drink. Her eyes scanned over the crowd of people. Briefly, she let her mind wander to Matthew, but she shut it down quickly. Before she went back to the group, she downed two shots of vodka and another gin and tonic.

Calpurnia rejoined the group and met back up with Holden and Oliver. She looked around for Mattie but didn't see him anywhere, so she stayed where she was. People came up and talked to them but Cal zoned out, for the most part, gradually draining her drinks and going over for more.

Holden and Oliver found her again and made small talk with some others who had tagged along, Cal hadn't caught their names. She took particular interest in the straw wrapper she'd found at the table. Folding and unfolding it into all different sizes. Started over with a blank canvas when she'd got a new drink.

She could feel herself getting sloppy, unable to control her body as well as she usually could. The room felt aloof and out of focus, but she continued ordering drinks and drinking them. She ran into someone as she stumbled by and would've hit the floor had they not grabbed her arms to stop her.

"Sorry" she slurred and continued her path back to where she had stood the entire evening. She leaned against the wall to help the spinning of the room, and her eyes remained glued to the floor. She saw two feet stop and stand in front of her and slowly looked up to see who it was.

"Hey, beautiful," a deep voice said, she stood up straighter trying to sort herself out. She felt a hand wrap around her wrist and another grab her waist. "Let's dance?" She thought it over for a moment, with her nails pressing half moons into the heels of her hands. Then nodded.

Cal followed behind him as he held her hand and guided her away from where she had been standing to the crowded dance floor. When they found a spot, his hands found her waist and pulled her so she was facing him. She swayed to the rhythm of the song and felt her head droop so she leaned forward and pressed her forehead against his chest.

"You're so sexy." He said into her ear and his hand slid down to cup her ass. Cal swatted his hand away but he just turned her around and pressed himself up against her backside. His hands roamed over her roughly and briefly, Cal thought she should stop him but she couldn't form coherent thoughts. She pinched the soft skin on the inside of her elbow hoping that in a moment it would be over and she'd be away.

"Where's Mattie?" she said and when he didn't respond she spoke louder, "I want Mattie where is he?"

"I don't know, you're dancing with me." he pulled her harder against him by her hips. 

Cal knew she was in trouble when his hand squeezed her buttcheek so hard she let out a whimper. She tried to push away from him, but he gripped her against him too tightly. The room was spinning, Cal felt tears in her eyes, she needed out.

His lips roughly made contact with her neck, while his hand held her jaw in place, teeth jabbing into the skin of her jaw uncomfortably. She couldn't breathe. She tried to push against him, but her body felt like jello.

After what seemed like an eternity he pulled back and his hands left her body so abruptly she stumbled back into someone. Arms held her up as her head bobbed forward and she tried to regain her balance.

"Cal, look at me" she forced her head up to look at who was talking. She saw the blonde of his hair before her eyes focused on his face. He was saying more but she couldn't hear it over the thumping of her heartbeat in her ears. She pulled her arms out of his grip and stumbled towards the bar.

"Shot of vodka," she said hollowly, not even looking at the bartender. She tipped the shot glass into her mouth with shaky hands. Just as she raised her hand for another round she felt a hand press into the small of her back. A small yelp escaped her lips and she jerked away. Her breath quickened and her limbs began to tremble again.

"Leave me alone," Calpurnia demanded looking up at the stranger. He put his hands up in mock surrender and walked away. She looked around frantically for the exit, and when she finally located it she stumbled out of it into the cool night air.

She walked aimlessly down the sidewalk sucking in mouthfuls of air for her begging lungs. Calpurnia's arms wrapped around herself tightly and the wind bit at her cheeks. She'd only been walking a minute or so when she heard faint shouts of her name. She stopped and listened searching for the source when finally she turned around and spotted Matthew jogging, making his way to her.

Cal had not even known she'd been crying. Not until after Mattie had managed to get her in a cab with her head in his lap wiping the wetness from her cheeks as it came. He kept one hand in her hair gently rubbing her head, and the other took turns brushing off tears and rubbing her arm.

She spent the majority of the night on the bathroom floor, the first half of the night hunched over the toilet. The other half with her face pressed against the cool tile of the floor. Her mind wandered to the events of the night. Matthew letting go of her hand, avoiding her the whole night, she stopped her train of thought there, not ready to relive anything else. Was he embarrassed by her?

Despite her refusing to let him in the bathroom with her, Matthew sat outside the door the entire time. He came in at some point and picked her up off the floor and carried her into the living room to lay on the couch. Even after puking, she hadn't sobered up. She sat up as he moved to walk away, but she reached out and latched onto the bottom of his shirt.

"Mattie" she whispered, her voice cracked and a tear slipped from her eye. He knelt in front of the couch and leveled his face with hers, brows furrowed.

"What do I do?" He asked quietly. Despite trying to keep herself calm, sobs ripped through her stealing her breath. He wrapped his fingers around her ankle, her legs crossed between them. "What do I do, Callie?" His tone was desperate and frantic this time, but her sobs continued, her breath shortening to gasps. Chest heaving, body begging for air, hands shaking rubbing up and down her thighs.

When Matthew finally got her to settle down she couldn't even open her eyes. Her body was pressed against him firmly, shaking from the adrenaline. His hands spread across her back, forcing her closer to him. 

"You let go of my hand," Calpurnia whispered into the quiet of the apartment.