A Year Without Snow

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Friday, 15th April 2016 - The Past - Part 1

I was on the benches of the basketball gymnasium, watching the team play. Since Bryson had been made the team's captain he had forced me to come to every single practice. And so me, Scar, and Grace had made our way after school to come watch them. This new routine had been good for me on various levels, but especially because I had been avoiding spending time at home, which meant I spent most of my time at the Kanne's. My mom had been working extra hours, only going home to sleep, for the same reason as me.

The house I had called a home for the last 12 years now felt empty for the first time. It felt like its soul had been ripped out, it didn't feel like home. Because I realized it was never Oak Hollow that saved me and my mom, it had been her. And her house had become simply four walls filled with memories of a lifetime, of a family long forgotten and an indescribable sadness. It would take months for me to return home and see it for what it used to be, the problem is that I would be forced to.

People say that when someone dies it seems like their essence and presence it's still around, their clothes still hung in the closet, their watches still waiting to be worn, their cellphones lying around waiting for the familiar hand to grasp them. But not with her. I unlocked my front door and felt nothing but emptiness and hollowness.

But like everyone around me felt the need to remind "I had to be strong." And that was what I was doing. I went out with my friends, I watched movies with Bryson, I went to basketball games, I played video games with Bryson. There had been a lot of Bryson, never enough of him though.

I forced myself to bring my attention back to their practice and noticed that Bryson hadn't failed to score once since the practice had started. He was getting good, too good. A group of freshmen girls was sitting on the opposite side of the court drooling at him. Which bothered me. They didn't care about him or his personality, they only paid attention to his looks and basketball skills. But what fazed me more was Melanie, who was sitting with some girls from our year, all hungrily eyeing him. I had to refrain myself from jumping from my seat and hurling at them.

This new routine of watching his practices also helped me in the Jack department. I had broken up with him after my grandma's funeral, more coldly and rudely than I needed to, but once something brutal happens in your life you get tired of the unspoken words and the sacrifices you used to make for others' feelings. But Jack didn't take it all too well because he didn't seem capable of leaving me alone, he was always lurking in the hallways hoping to find me alone and beg me to give him another chance, texting me multiple times to talk trash about Bryson, saying he wasn't good enough for me. I was getting exhausted. He had been trying to talk to my friends too trying to convince me, Scar simply ignored him because she knew I didn't like him, but Grace was too much of a softie to ignore him, so sometimes I saw them talking.

"But I'm due to get tired of him anytime soon." Scar said from beside me waking me up from my thoughts.

"But I thought you liked him," Grace said in a confused tone.

"And I do, amazing sex and all, but I'm bound to get bored." Scar said as she stared at Carson.

"I don't understand you. I couldn't be with someone without feeling something for them." Grace said.

"Well, sex sometimes is just sex. The idea that sex and love have always to go hand in hand, is outdated."

"What about Jack, Daisy?" Grace asked ignoring Scar, "Still pondering about giving him another chance?"

"What? No." I answered, "There's no way in hell."

"But he likes you so much," Grace argued. "He's been crazy about you for years."