New Zealand: i love bees :) they're important to the ecosystem and they're cute and they make honey
Australia: buzz buzz
New Zealand, shaking: please don't hurt me
~~~
Canada: character flaws are important!!
Australia: me when someone tells me to stop eating mayo packets like they're gogurts
Canada: you what
~~~
Australia: how do I become a jellyfish?
New Zealand: well, jellyfishes have no brains, so you're already pretty close
Australia: okay WOW
~~~
New Zealand: you know those lawn mower roombas? Vegetarian roombas
Canada: the implication that regular roombas consume meat is frankly terrifying
Australia: well dust is in fact mostly bits of human skin so regular roombas just consume skin
~~~
America: I never brag
New Zealand: you once called your face proof of god's existence
~~~
America, teaching Australia how to drive: alright, you ready to learn how to drive?
Australia: are you ready for me to learn how to drive?
America: sure. I've had a good life.
~~~
Australia: I love to make up phrases and finish it with "if you know what I mean" because that implies theres meaning behind it and leaves the recipient wondering
New Zealand: i too love to shake up the old bag of hammers if you know what I mean
Australia: I know exactly what you mean my dude
~~~
Australia: hey sorry I'm late I was busy with a little b and e
New Zealand, distraught: you went to a bed and breakfast without me??
Australia: no I said b and e, breaking and entering
New Zealand:
New Zealand, more distraught: without me????
~~~
America: before I die I'm gonna consume an entire bag of popcorn kernels just to make cremation more fun
Canada: that is a horrifying thought
~~~
America: do you ever want to stockpile your own blood over the course of a few years and then just go and spread it everywhere before mysteriously disappearing, leaving suspicious amounts of blood throughout the city, and turning your whole town into a crime scene which no one can accurately explain outside of somehow being murdered simultaneously outside of like eight Taco Bells?
Canada: ...are you okay?
America: I have never once been okay in my life
~~~
Australia: without ugly, beauty wouldn't exist in the world
New Zealand: Thank you for your sacrifice
~~~
Canada: Look! A tree!
America: what? A rat?
New Zealand: he said a tree not a rat
America: huh
Australia: a fucking tree not a fucking rat
America: I'm not fucking a tree rat!!!
~~~
America: snake bite leg what do
Australia: elevate and apply pressure
America: *holding up the snake* you better apologize now
~~~
New Zealand: i just saw a thing that said "you didn't wake up today to be mediocre* uhm yes I did it's a tuesday
~~~
America: *sleep deprived* you guys be like 'period'
America: but I be like 'semi colon'. I'm done for now but I'll have more to say later
Canada: please sleep
~~~
America: to save time, don't cook meat. Simply eat it raw and light yourself on fire to cook it!
Canada: no
Australia: that sounds like a great idea
Canada: it does not
~~~
New Zealand: what's your biggest fear?
Australia: I threw a boomerang a year ago and it still hasn't come back. I live in constant fear
~~~
America: imagine if you came home one night and we were all just quietly reading
Britain: I would instantly be suspicious
YOU ARE READING
CountryHumans Incorrect Quotes
Fanfictionyeah uhm.... enjoy some skits, as me and my friends call them. I don't even know what characters are gonna be in here so.... hope it's good! Updates are slow but they will happen!! Also Disclaimer I don't support any of the bad things in this book i...
