A Frog's Way Home (The Calamity Girls Book 3)

Newts in Tights

We were days away from the Earth invasion. Anne, Sprig, and I were given orders to attempt recruiting more rebels for the resistance. "Those newts and toads are wearing Andrias' armor. How could anyone choose to be on Andrias' side?" Anne asked. "Ugh. Those traitors!" Sprig exclaimed. "Wait a second. Who's that?" I grabbed my binoculars to see a young newt, who looked injured. That's when a small group of newts defended the kid, who ultimately fought beside them. "Cool! Rebel newts!" Sprig gasped. "Awesome. Let's see if they join us." I added as arrows were barely shot at us by the same group. "Whoa, we're on the same side!" Anne warned. "I'm on no one's side but my own!" A familiar voice shouted. "Wait, I know that voice." Anne groaned when Tritonio came out of hiding. "Tritonio." I grunted. "I should have known." "Well, well, if it isn't three of my best pupils." Tritonio greeted. "Still have my family sword, Anne?" "Why don't you come over here and find out." Anne replied, drawing the sword. "Charming. Well, we had a great haha catching up, but we're in a hurry." Tritonio said. "Little Louise, relieve these three of their supplies." "Typical, the world is falling apart and you're still thinking about yourself." I scoffed. "Mr Tritonio, how'd I do?" The kid asked. "Excellent, my little JoJo Potato!" Tritonio replied. "Oh, and I heard those soldiers say there's gonna be an even bigger caravan passing through the woods at 3 o'clock." JoJo added. "Ah, great recon work, JoJo." Tritonio complimented. "But, Mr Tritonio, how do we get past the giant collared beasts that got the caravan?" JoJo asked. "Those things again?" Louise questioned. "They were such a pain last time." "Collared beasties, eh?" Sprig asked. "They're easy to take down once you know the trick." "Ah, so you dealt with it before? What am I saying? Of course you have." Tritonio said. "You are the bravest, smartest pupils I've ever had." "You're just buttering us up so we'll help you." Anne sighed. "And it's working." Sprig added. "C'mon, guys. Let's help them!" "Fine. But only if you promise to join the resistance afterwards." I groaned. "Done." Tritonio replied. "And no backstabbing, double-crossing or other such deception." I continued. "You wound me, Rowena." Tritonio said. "I wasn't done. Last thing is don't go anywhere near my lucky driver." I finished. "You're still on edge after trying to break it." "Fine!" Tritonio snarled. "Come my friends, to the secret hideout!" "Wait, before we go, what's up with the tights?" Anne asked. "Reduces friction. We run faster." Tritonio replied. "And we look amazing." JoJo added as the crew began flexing in their tights. "I shouldn't have asked." Anne said. "Yeah, you really shouldn't have." I replied.

Tritonio and his crew took us to their secret camp. Tritonio showed the plan to Anne and I. "And voilà!" Tritonio exclaimed. "We ride away from the caravan victorious." "Wow, you have a real talent for strategy." Anne complimented. "Too bad you're a no good, backstabbing scallywag." I mumbled. "You'd be a scallywag too, if you grew up like me." Tritonio explains. "I was born a street urchin, no family, no one to look out for me. I learned to survive by joining whatever street crew I crossed paths with. But alas, living on the street meant loyalty was staged. When things get bad, it's always everyone for themselves." "You're telling us that if push comes to shove, you'd even leave these guys in the dust?" I asked. "It is the law of the streets: no loyalties, no attachments." Tritonio replied. "Ah, it is time. The caravan shall be passing through in mere minutes." "Let's go!" Anne exclaimed.

Once we found the caravan, Anne, Sprig, and I were in charge of distracting the snakes in spore collars. "Hey, Slither-Brains!" Sprig shouted. "The dum-dum convention is two miles that way." "That is so rude!" The driver gasped. "Guards!" Sprig shot mud in the snakes faces with his slingshot. "Catch us if you can." Sprig taunted. The newts opened the caravan, but it was a trap. Tritonio's gang was captured by some of Andrias' frobo soldiers. As we tried taking out the snakes, Tritonio just stood there in shock. "Tritonio! You have to help them!" Anne exclaimed. "Farewell, my friends." Tritonio sighed and ran into the opposite direction. "No! Dang it." I grunted as we destroyed the spore collars and ran after Tritonio.

Anne, Sprig, and I followed Tritonio back to his camp. Though he was trying hard not to, he regret his decision. "Tritonio, come on!" Anne explains. "We can still save them." "And risk capture ourselves?" Tritonio asked. "No can do, kids. The rules of the street, remember? No attachments, no regrets." "But what about the resistance?" Sprig asked. "You said..." "Come on, Sprig. You know I was never going to do that!" Tritonio snapped. Anne tossed her sword near Tritonio's hat. "¡Dios mío!" Tritonio gasped. "Look, dude. If you want to abandon your friends who you clearly adore, that's your call, but it kills me to see you leave like this." Anne said. "If you grew up how I did..." Tritonio exclaimed. "We get that. We do what we need to do to survive." I sighed. "I gotta say, for a master thief, I'm pretty disappointed in you." "How so?" Tritonio asked. "You're leaving the best loot in the world on the table." Anne replied, kissing me and playfully tapping Sprig. "Friendship. Comrades. Someone to count on. By throwing those things away, you're only robbing yourself. Come on, Rowena and Sprig. We have a very merry band to save." "Frog yeah! Let's rescue these weirdos!" I exclaimed. "Right behind you." Sprig replied. "Later, Tritonio."

We left the camp to go find the caravan. "This way." Anne said, pulling behind some bushes to reveal the newts. "There they are." "In the name of the king, I find you guilty of disturbing the peace, to which there is only one punishment." A robot said, dressed as a judge. "Hey, you metal freaks! Permission to approach the bench?!" I asked. The robots prepared their axes. "So, you've chosen death by the queen of frog abuse and her awesome girlfriend?" Anne added. "Babe, that's so cute." I blushed. "You are an awesome girlfriend." Sprig freed the newts while the soldiers were distracted by me and Anne. Tritonio's crew took out the robot soldiers. Suddenly, the judge robot got angry and was ready to destroy us. "Oh, no." Anne whispered. "Deploying corporal punishment!" The robot shouted, launching rockets at us. As JoJo was about to get himself killed, an arrow was shot into one of the robot's eyes. Tritonio came back for his friends. "Mr Tritonio! You came back!" JoJo gasped. "But what about the rules of the streets?" "Ha! You think I, Tritonio, give a fig about rules?" Tritonio asked. That's when the newts teamed up together to take out the judge. Once the robot was defeated, I caught JoJo before the little guy could fall. "Gotcha!" I exclaimed. "Three cheers for the greatest newt of them all!" Louise shouted as the newts tossed Tritonio in the air.

Back at camp, we continued to celebrate Tritonio's victory. "Some victory grule, señoras?" Tritonio asked. "Thanks, Tritonio. So, what happened to No loyalties?" Anne asked. "Uh, I just happened to be passing by and my arrow flew out of my bow." Tritonio lied. "What are the odds?" "Mmm-hmm. Face it, Big T." I said. "It feels good to have someone's back." "Yeah, maybe." Tritonio sighed. "Listen, being on your own may have worked before, but the fate of Amphibia rests on whether we can defeat Andrias." Anne said. "Yeah, the rebellion could really use folks like you on our side." Sprig added. "Sasha keeps saying we need help with our battle strategy, and who's better at strategy than you?" I asked. "I know you're just buttering me up so I'll help you." Tritonio chuckled. "Well, I learned from the best." I replied. "I was wrong about you, Tritonio." "I gotta say, you're not those same girls I met all those months ago." Tritonio said. "Henceforth, the rebellion shall be our new crew!"

Back at the base, we met up with Sasha. "Great news, Sasha. We just recruited the top newt strategist." Anne announced. "That's awesome!" Sasha cheered. "Now, come follow me. Hop Pop and Rosalina just found something really interesting." Sasha took us to Rosalina and Hop Pop, who were standing in front of a door. "Oh, there you guys are." Rosalina greeted. "So, I, uh, got lost while looking for the bathroom and found this strange looking door." Hop Pop explains. "There's no telling what could be in there." Rosalina added. "Trouble is we can't figure out how to open it. There's no knob or handle. Just this little book-sized slot." "Book-sized?" Sprig asked. "Hop Pop! Have you tried sliding the family tome into it? The one that had the Calamity Box drawings inside?" "It's worth a shot. Lemme go get it!" Hop Pop shouted, running to grab the tome.

Once Hop Pop got back with the tome, he pushed it into the slot and the door opened, revealing an old bedroom. Sprig walked up to a desk to see an old letter. "It says..." Sprig said. "Nothing! It's blank." "Well, this is disappointing." Sasha commented. "Our family sure was mysterious." Hop Pop explains. "Come on, let's get outta here and head to the canteen." I said. "I'm starving."