If Only They Knew (Book 1.5) (AU Series) - INTERSEX

Chapter Twenty-Five

Deleena

She did not... she did. She did, in fact, just say those words. And then rushed out. Like she didn't just freaking say them. I don't even think she realized she said them. But I realized. I heard the words. Loud and clear. I had to sit through two more hours of school... with those three words bouncing around in my head. Did she even mean to say them? She had to. Right? Would I say them back? Wait... do I feel the same way? We've been dating for two months and I've known her for 4. Is it too soon to have these types of feelings for her?

Sit down De

Breathe

In

and

Out

Take your time and just...breathe.

My phone buzzes on the nightstand, and I rush through my room, anticipating that it's her.

[Sorry, I can't come over tonight.]

I sigh and fall back on my bed. Damn Vale, drop a bomb and not come over after, why don't you? I blow a deep breath through my lips, making them flutter.

There's a knock at my door. "Come in, Jeffery." I know it's him because no other maid comes to talk to me. Jeffery is in charge of all of them. So they go to him first before coming to me. I've known him for so long, and honestly, he was the father I never had. My actual father was so ashamed of what he did he never wanted to look me in the eye or be around me. He's afraid he might slip up and tell me how he killed my mother.

Jeffery opens the door but doesn't come in. "How was work?"

I let out an exhausted squeal while stretching across my bed. "Long Jef."

"Anything interesting?" I smirk and nod. He gives me an attentive look wanting to know more.

"Valiana said the words." He cocks his head to the side until a light goes off in his head. "Yes..." I confirm.

"And... how do you feel about that?" I throw my head back down on the bed, grabbing a pillow and screaming into it while my legs kick the air in excitement. I sigh once all my jitters are out and toss the cushion to the side. "That good, huh?" he says, chuckling.

"Yes... that good. I feel great. Nervous to tell her... what if she didn't mean to say it? Or regrets it coming out? What if she doesn't even remember saying it? Like it just came out, and her brain was switched off, so like... it never happened?"

He continues chuckling, clearly thinking this is hilarious. "When have you ever seen her brain off?"

I tap my chin. He's right. "True."

"Just talk to her. She probably feels the same way."

"Ughhhh, I want to, but she's not coming over tonight. She canceled on me. She's probably already regretting saying it."

"I highly doubt it."

"Yeah..." I stare off into space blankly, not focusing on anything in particular.

"Okay, I'll let you be with your thoughts... is there anything I can get for you?" I glance down at my purse. Her black tribal printed journal sits there taunting me.

"Uhhh. Snacks. Lots of them. And liquor. Lots of that too."

He leaves, and within 10 minutes, I'm sitting in bed with a family-size bag of Cheeto puffs and her journal in hand.

I sip my wine while turning through the pages of her life.

𝐷𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝑗𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑎𝑙,